Thank you all again for your honest advice & wisdom, I think it has given me some perspective in this issue. I'm going to pray harder, give my best to the ministry I've been asked to work in, and hold my peace for now. Good things are happening at this church, and it would break my heart to know I did anything to damage that, however well meaning my intentions.
I'd also agree that a forum is maybe not the best place to get advice on the issue, but since no one here knows my real name or my church this is the only venue where there's no risk of embarrassing the gentleman in question by someone recognizing the description.
Thanks again, folks, & pray for me for wisdom.