Serena Williams was Right?

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by Evenuntodeath

I can read, thank you. Simply because she gave a "disclaimer", does not mean her words did not in some way place blame on the victim or make it seem like the victim has responsibility. You said she gave practical advice, are you serious??? Exactly how "practical" is her advice after a victim has been raped?? The rape has occurred, there is nothing that can do to change that. Just so you know, Serena Williams is not the first to give this so called "practical advice". Albeit, there are women who follow Serenas "practical advice" and STILL get raped. Truth is, practical advice on how not to get raped is not practical advice. Rapists will always find a way to seek out victims, alcohol or no alcohol.

Practical advice to ALL girls to PREVENT this from happening.

What's your advice to a young girl wanting to avoid being raped? "Tough, nothing you can do. It's gonna happen anyways"??

Houses get robbed anyways so don't lock your doors? That's your logic

Those were allegations, not proven facts. Witnesses say she did not have enough drinks in her system to pass out drunk. The victim also believes she was drugged.

All the more reason to be CAREFUL about who you hand out with and where you get your drinks from per Serena's advice

The victim was with people she thought were friends. Is she to blame because she made a mistake in judging a person's character or intentions?

Nobody said she was to blame.

See above. There IS NO practical advice to avoid being raped.

So just so you ladies know....you might as well unlock your doors at night and not worry about being out on the street late at night alone because you will get raped anyways and there is nothing you can do to contribute to your own safety? Serious? So you are saying DON'T try to prevent rape? That is asinine!

There IS, in fact, practical no brainer advice women can take to contribute to the prevention of being raped. You are wrong to suggest just because rapes do occur anyways women should not try to do anything to prevent them

Seriously?!? So girls going to a bar shouldn't take drinks from the bartender to avoid getting raped??? Girls should bring her own bottle of alcohol to avoid being raped???

Yes girls, you can trust the bartender to pour you a drink and not slip something into it according to Evenuntodeath. That's your great contribution?

Of course not. But how a girls dresses, how much she drinks are all the same sorry excuses people use to justify a girl getting raped.

Nobody mentioned how she dressed or how an other girl dressed. Nobody was justifying a girl getting raped. There is something wrong with you.

Again, see above. Women get raped regardless of where they are, who they're with, how much they're drinking, or how they're dressed.

So your great advice is....don't worry about it ladies because you will get raped anyways? Nothing you can do? And you express contempt and lies for anyone that wants to try to prevent these crimes?

Its time to stop examining women's behavior to find ways women can prevent their rape and start making rapists take FULL responsibility for their actions.

Nobody said women deserved it. You must live in a make believe world because THIS world is DANGEROUS and you can cut the heads off of a rapist and that won't change the nature of this world and the need to be cautious about where and who and what.

I'm a man and I take precautions in certain locations and at certain times of the day because I know how dangerous it is. Only a fool would through reason and caution to the wind and not seek to protect their own lives some how.

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by odooley6985

In this case she was right. Some rape cases just happen no matter what though.

Does that the translate into not taking any precautions? Of course not!

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by J4Truth

I understand where you're coming from but there is such a thing as practical advice to avoid being a victim. If there wasn't then there would be no safety precautions ever advised. We wouldn't advise children to not take candy from strangers, we wouldn't advise children and females of a sort of buddy system and many such like instructions. Yes there will always be criminals but you can't make a statement as there's no practical advice.

I understand telling a victim after the fact may come off as offensive and may be seen as blaming the victim for being a victim. But many rape victims later overcome and do talks to women groups to tell them what to watch out for and tell them what to do to avoid or prevent as much as possible what they went through also how to overcome if such an situation happen to them. So there's such a thing as practical advise.

In the end, there’s always going to be criminals and as longs as a crime can be proven in a court of law they’ll be convicted. But justice after the fact don’t erase the trauma from happening, preventing it does.

Exactly. Im sorry but it's her sort of knee jerk, subjective reaction to label anyone that gives advice on how to prevent these things as someone who believes "She deserved it" that is detrimental to the whole issue of prevention.

[Praxeas]

Practical advice to both men and women from the San Diego County District Attorney, San Diego County Sheriff's Department, San Diego Police Department, colleges, universities, the military, the Center for Community Solutions / Rape Trauma Center, the Sexual Assault Response Team and other community partners have teamed together to form the PRICE Coalition (Preventing Rape by Intoxication through Community Education). PRICE

RAPE BY INTOXICATION
Don't let it happen, and look out for your friends


Prevent Rape

• Face the facts: If she's wasted, intoxicated, asleep, or unconscious, she cannot give legal consent, even if she said "yes"
• Face the law: Rape by intoxication is a serious felony that can carry 8 years in state prison
• Drink responsibly - binge drinking is dangerous to your health, and can impair your judgment
• If your friend tries to take advantage of a woman who is too intoxicated or passed out, tell him to stop and explain that it's illegal and not right
• Pay attention to the warning signs including slurred speech and vomiting

Protect Yourself

• Stay with your trusted friends at all times
• Have a safety plan for you and each member of your group to get home
• Drink responsibly - binge drinking is dangerous to your health, and can impair your judgment
• Decide ahead of time how much you can safely drink while maintaining your good judgment. Stick to that limit.
• Don't accept a drink that is open, as you risk ingesting a date rape drug
• Never leave an intoxicated friend unattended, and make sure that you can count on the same for you. Help your friend by giving her water to prevent dehydration, and putting her on her side to avoid choking on vomit. If symptoms worsen, call 911 as she could have alcohol poisoning
• Always lock your doors and windows, and if you are looking after a friend, make sure that doors and windows are locked before you leave

http://www.sdcda.org/helping/prevent-rape/

[Godzchild]

Originally Posted by Praxeas

Practical advice to both men and women from the San Diego County District Attorney, San Diego County Sheriff's Department, San Diego Police Department, colleges, universities, the military, the Center for Community Solutions / Rape Trauma Center, the Sexual Assault Response Team and other community partners have teamed together to form the PRICE Coalition (Preventing Rape by Intoxication through Community Education). PRICE

RAPE BY INTOXICATION
Don't let it happen, and look out for your friends


Prevent Rape

• Face the facts: If she's wasted, intoxicated, asleep, or unconscious, she cannot give legal consent, even if she said "yes"
• Face the law: Rape by intoxication is a serious felony that can carry 8 years in state prison
• Drink responsibly - binge drinking is dangerous to your health, and can impair your judgment
• If your friend tries to take advantage of a woman who is too intoxicated or passed out, tell him to stop and explain that it's illegal and not right
• Pay attention to the warning signs including slurred speech and vomiting

Protect Yourself

• Stay with your trusted friends at all times
• Have a safety plan for you and each member of your group to get home
• Drink responsibly - binge drinking is dangerous to your health, and can impair your judgment
• Decide ahead of time how much you can safely drink while maintaining your good judgment. Stick to that limit.
• Don't accept a drink that is open, as you risk ingesting a date rape drug
• Never leave an intoxicated friend unattended, and make sure that you can count on the same for you. Help your friend by giving her water to prevent dehydration, and putting her on her side to avoid choking on vomit. If symptoms worsen, call 911 as she could have alcohol poisoning
• Always lock your doors and windows, and if you are looking after a friend, make sure that doors and windows are locked before you leave

http://www.sdcda.org/helping/prevent-rape/

[Nitehawk013]

Quit blaming the victim Prax!

Your common sense preventative measures are offensive and useless since we all know rape cannot be prevented in any case or under any circumstances.

[Evenuntodeath]

Originally Posted by J4Truth

I understand where you're coming from but there is such a thing as practical advice to avoid being a victim. If there wasn't then there would be no safety precautions ever advised. We wouldn't advise children to not take candy from strangers, we wouldn't advise children and females of a sort of buddy system and many such like instructions. Yes there will always be criminals but you can't make a statement as there's no practical advice.

I understand telling a victim after the fact may come off as offensive and may be seen as blaming the victim for being a victim. But many rape victims later overcome and do talks to women groups to tell them what to watch out for and tell them what to do to avoid or prevent as much as possible what they went through also how to overcome if such an situation happen to them. So there's such a thing as practical advise.

In the end, there’s always going to be criminals and as longs as a crime can be proven in a court of law they’ll be convicted. But justice after the fact don’t erase the trauma from happening, preventing it does.

We are specifically talking about Serena Williams comments. The advice Serena Williams gave "don't take drinks from people you don't know" is NOT practical nor is it even logical. In fact, its so vague that any young girl trying to avoid being raped would not even know what to take from it. Is she saying that women should not take drinks from the bartender? The bartender is a stranger. Should women not get drink or get intoxicated for fear of being raped??? Do we live in the 1800's?? My point was that Serena Williams comments were nonsensical and foolish. Women are just as entitled to go to a bar/party and have a few drinks just like men, if they so choose. And YES, they should be able to do it without fear of being raped. We are apostolic and many of us don't believe in drinking, but in no way would I impose my beliefs on other people nor take a self righteous stance when something horrible happens simply because the said person is living in sin. At the end of the day, the rapist bears entire responsiblity for the rape.

As for rape victims that speak to women groups, these are victims who blame themselves because we live in a culture which teaches rape victims to take responsibility for their own rape. Oftentimes these rape victims give advice on how to avoid being raped by strangers. If you look at rape statistics, the MAJORITY of rapes are NOT committed by strangers, its by someone the victims knows. How does someone avoid being raped by a family member, boyfriend, friend, or husband?? In the long run, this advice in ineffective. And why is this advice always directed towards women?? Why don't people lecture men on how not to rape women??

Of course, there will always be crime. But the problem with rape prevention advice is that it makes victims feel ashamed and prevents victims from reporting their rape. Studies show rape is highly unreported because victims fear being blamed or shamed. As a result, many serial rapists go scott free and continue to rape other women. Rape prevention advice does more harm than good.

[Evenuntodeath]

Originally Posted by Praxeas

Practical advice to ALL girls to PREVENT this from happening.

What's your advice to a young girl wanting to avoid being raped? "Tough, nothing you can do. It's gonna happen anyways"??

Houses get robbed anyways so don't lock your doors? That's your logic

You're comparing apples and oranges. If you actually did your research, you would know the majority of rape victims are not raped by strangers, they are raped by someone they know. So exactly what sort of practical advice would you give to someone who was raped by a boyfriend, husband or family member??? After all these years on lecturing women, it hasn't made much difference in lowering rape occurrences. In fact, rape is STILL a huge problem on college campuses. Fancy that, huh?? So here's an idea, how about we start giving advice to MEN on A) how not to rape women, B) no means no, and C) when a women is passed out, its NOT ok to have sex with her.

All the more reason to be CAREFUL about who you hand out with and where you get your drinks from per Serena's advice

Wow!!! So not only is the girl at fault for taking drinks, she is also at fault for someone deliberately planning her rape and slipping a drug into her drink. You hear that ladies???? Even if you only had a drink or two, not to worry!!! You are still to blame if a predator decides to drug you too. Nice.....

Nobody said she was to blame

Serena's comments DID blame the victim. So what, she added a little disclaimer, at the end of the day she said the victim did not take proper precaution.

So just so you ladies know....you might as well unlock your doors at night and not worry about being out on the street late at night alone because you will get raped anyways and there is nothing you can do to contribute to your own safety? Serious? So you are saying DON'T try to prevent rape? That is asinine!

I'm saying that instead of directing most of the advice towards women, its time to direct more advice towards men.

There IS, in fact, practical no brainer advice women can take to contribute to the prevention of being raped. You are wrong to suggest just because rapes do occur anyways women should not try to do anything to prevent them

Rape prevention advice has been around for a LONG time. Its NOTHING new under the sun. Rape still occurs at high rates nationwide in homes, in cars, in colleges and yes even in churches. So what now??? Its time to start taking a new approach and providing harsher sentences towards rapists and encouraging rape victims to speak out, instead of lecturing them after the fact on how they could of prevented their rape. That sir, is ASININE.

Yes girls, you can trust the bartender to pour you a drink and not slip something into it according to Evenuntodeath. That's your great contribution?

And what is your suggestion praxeas??? "Now ladies, anytime you go to a bar make sure you bring your own bottle of wine, cus you know that bartender could rape you and you would be to blame......"

Nobody mentioned how she dressed or how an other girl dressed. Nobody was justifying a girl getting raped. There is something wrong with you

.

No, there is something wrong with YOU. How a women dresses, how much she has to drink are all the same old tired arguments used to lecture women on how they could have prevented their rape. Which, according to you is practical advice.

So your great advice is....don't worry about it ladies because you will get raped anyways? Nothing you can do? And you express contempt and lies for anyone that wants to try to prevent these crimes?

You express insensitivity and lack of compassion towards any rape victim, by posting Serena's foolish comments on this board. As for the rest of what you said, see comments above.

Nobody said women deserved it.

Anytime someone says a victim could have taken more precaution or done something differently, they are implying a victim is partially to blame for the incident. You can play with words all you want, at the end of the day, that is the message you are sending.

You must live in a make believe world because THIS world is DANGEROUS and you can cut the heads off of a rapist and that won't change the nature of this world and the need to be cautious about where and who and what.

You live in make believe world and clearly have not done your research on the nature of rape or how rape occurs.

I'm a man and I take precautions in certain locations and at certain times of the day because I know how dangerous it is. Only a fool would through reason and caution to the wind and not seek to protect their own lives some how.

Good for you. Then maybe you too, can utilize Serena's advice in order to avoid being raped. After all, male on male rape occurs at high rates too. Good day sir!!!

[Evenuntodeath]

The Truth About Rape: It Can Happen to Anyone

When we understand the myths that surround rape we can more effectively help people heal from this traumatic, life-altering crime.

Anyone can be raped. This crime does not discriminate: No segment of society is truly safe from rape — men and women, the young and the old, and people of all ethnic and economic backgrounds have been victims. Although the legal definition of rape varies from state to state, rape is generally defined as “forced or nonconsensual sexual contact.” It is an act of aggression and power combined with some form of sexual contact. Victims may be raped by a stranger, an acquaintance, or even a loved one. Every victim copes with this traumatic experience differently, but there is one common feature in every rape experience: It’s never the victim’s fault!

Despite the past 30 years of increasing rape awareness and advocacy for victims, there are still many misconceptions about rape, and these myths can complicate the healing process for survivors. To help people who have been raped deal with their pain, it’s necessary to first address these myths and bring this topic out into the light so it can be discussed from a place of knowledge and compassionate understanding.

MYTH: The incidence of rape is exaggerated by the media and is not really that common.

FACT: In the United States, one in six women reported experiencing an attempted or completed rape at some time in their lives, according to the Centers for Disease Control. For women in college, 20 percent to 25 percent claim to have been victims of sexual violence.


MYTH: Women "ask for it."

FACT: Nobody ever wants or asks to be sexually assaulted. The idea that women deserve to be raped because they dress or behave "provocatively" shifts responsibility away from the offender and on to the victim. Every woman should have the liberty to dress and behave as she chooses without fearing that she is inviting sexual assault.

MYTH: Women who drink or take drugs often have a role in the rape.

FACT: We live in a culture that tends to blame victims, but rape is never the survivor’s fault. No one deserves to have been raped or invites sexual assault, even if the person has drunk to excess or exhibited bad judgment.

MYTH: Men can't be sexually assaulted.

FACT: Men are sexually assaulted. Any man can be sexually assaulted regardless of size, strength, appearance, or sexual orientation. Approximately 92,700 men are raped each year in the United States, according to statistics from the Illinois Attorney General’s office.

MYTH: Rape is committed only by strangers or crazed psychopaths who exist on the margins of society.

FACT: In 2000, the Centers for Disease Control reported that eight out of ten rape or sexual-assault victims not only knew the offender but stated that the crime was perpetrated by a boyfriend or girlfriend, relative, friend, or acquaintance. The overwhelming majority of rapists are seemingly normal people from a wide range of socioeconomic classes, occupations, and nationalities.

MYTH: Attractive young women are really the only group that need to worry about rape.

FACT: From an old, frail man in a nursing home to a young child, from a sophisticated urban apartment dweller to an impoverished rural resident, this traumatic and terrible crime happens to people from every demographic. Rape doesn’t discriminate on the basis of age, race, sex, or income.


MYTH: Rape is an impulsive act.

FACT: These crimes are not spontaneous, uncontrollable sexual acts. As many as 75 percent of all sexual assaults are planned in advance, often with the victim being targeted and monitored by the assailant.

MYTH: Women make up stories about rape because they want attention.

FACT: Rape is notoriously one of the most underreported of crimes: Only about 30 percent of rapes are reported to the police. Sadly, many rape victims not only fear retaliation by the offender but believe they will be judged by society for their falsely perceived role in the assault.

MYTH: A person who has really been sexually assaulted will be hysterical.

FACT: There is no “right way” to react to sexual assault. Sexual assault victims can be calm, hysterical, withdrawn, angry, in denial, or in shock.

Each survivor copes with rape differently. It is important to remember that there is no right way for a survivor to feel, and there is no set timeline for when a survivor should be feeling better.

Think of it this way: People do not ask to be mugged, yet every day thousands of people are accosted and robbed and barely know what hit them. The same is true for rape victims. Rape is an act of aggression and anyone can be raped.

http://www.drlauraberman.com/sexual-...uth-about-rape

[Praxeas]

So because the majority of rapes happen by people women know women should NOT be careful and take certain precautions to prevent being raped by a stranger?