Colossians 2:8 Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
Just an observation most folks advising don't have a pastor and some do not even attend an Apostolic church. Remember what David said about the counsel of the ungodly.
Elder, i certainly did suggest moving forward with the letter... not because I endorse the option but because the individual is going to do this no matter what.
in my experience, trying to convince leavers to stay never really works out well.
I know that no pastor likes to lose someone. Ive had more than one conversation with my pastor on the subject. I love my pastor for his love of people. He is kind and longsuffering and has never once just "let go" of someone. BUT there have been times when I have suggested to him that subtraction has meant addition to the church.
__________________ If I do something stupid blame the Lortab!
Elder, i certainly did suggest moving forward with the letter... not because I endorse the option but because the individual is going to do this no matter what.
in my experience, trying to convince leavers to stay never really works out well.
I know that no pastor likes to lose someone. Ive had more than one conversation with my pastor on the subject. I love my pastor for his love of people. He is kind and longsuffering and has never once just "let go" of someone. BUT there have been times when I have suggested to him that subtraction has meant addition to the church.
This is very true. As a Pastor for 4 decades there has been very few folks I wanted to see leave. I loved them even the unruly hold a place in your hearts. But there are times your peace means more than their presence. I confess when I was younger I probably did not handle it as good as I should have. I was hurt and felt as if I had failed. But at least the last 25 years I have handled it much different if someone wanted to leave I tried to make it as less painful as I could. I wanted to leave the door open for them and I did not want to become their enemy. Generally after their departure would be very dark days for me personally where I would examine every dealing I had with them and their children. Yes honestly there were times some of the blame was at my door and other times it was no ones blame things just happen. But as I type this I see faces of years ago where they are I don't know but I do know this I love them yet dearly and hope for their best. Parting generally comes with such sorrow. That is my story.
This is very true. As a Pastor for 4 decades there has been very few folks I wanted to see leave. I loved them even the unruly hold a place in your hearts. But there are times your peace means more than their presence. I confess when I was younger I probably did not handle it as good as I should have. I was hurt and felt as if I had failed. But at least the last 25 years I have handled it much different if someone wanted to leave I tried to make it as less painful as I could. I wanted to leave the door open for them and I did not want to become their enemy. Generally after their departure would be very dark days for me personally where I would examine every dealing I had with them and their children. Yes honestly there were times some of the blame was at my door and other times it was no ones blame things just happen. But as I type this I see faces of years ago where they are I don't know but I do know this I love them yet dearly and hope for their best. Parting generally comes with such sorrow. That is my story.
Elder Epley even my old pastor, I have rekindled a friendship back with him. I got saved under his hand.
We do the best we can. In the big picture we are all broken people in need of a Savior.
He did what he understood to be the right thing from his experience and I did what I needed to do for my little family.
Deep in me is love for him when I look back on the times we served together.
I plan on taking a trip back to California and one of the 1st none family members I will see is him and we will break bread and will fellowship the difference.
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Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand. (Romans 14:4)
Scripture is its own interpreter. Nothing can cut a diamond but a diamond. Nothing can interpret Scripture but Scripture" Thomas Watson.
My old original pastor never tries to contact anyone when they leave. His thoughts are "They left the meeting house." and "Jonah went to Nineveh when he was ready." We served in his church for 9 years and worked with him some afterwards but he has never once tried to contact us since we left nor even sent us a Christmas card. But then, I never expected him to. (Haven't heard from him nor spoken to him in probably nine years.)
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
Maybe it's just me, but all this drama and stuff... over going to a church much closer to your home, where you already have an influence in the community that can be used for the glory of God...?????
I mean, it's not like he's 'never gonna see' the old pastor again... right?
It's not like he and the old pastor aren't going to continue to relate to one another as brothers in the Lord, members of God's household, with the same faith, same spirit... right???
I mean, seriously... it's not like he's leaving because he just fell away, backslid, dumping his wife for some hussy, on drugs, worshipping idols.... right???
Maybe it's just me, but all this drama and stuff... over going to a church much closer to your home, where you already have an influence in the community that can be used for the glory of God...?????
I mean, it's not like he's 'never gonna see' the old pastor again... right?
It's not like he and the old pastor aren't going to continue to relate to one another as brothers in the Lord, members of God's household, with the same faith, same spirit... right???
I mean, seriously... it's not like he's leaving because he just fell away, backslid, dumping his wife for some hussy, on drugs, worshipping idols.... right???
I don't see why there should be a problem.
At least not on his end...
But we all know his pastor could MAKE it a problem. That is the only concern here and you know, some of them do.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
Colossians 2:8 Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
This is very true. As a Pastor for 4 decades there has been very few folks I wanted to see leave. I loved them even the unruly hold a place in your hearts. But there are times your peace means more than their presence. I confess when I was younger I probably did not handle it as good as I should have. I was hurt and felt as if I had failed. But at least the last 25 years I have handled it much different if someone wanted to leave I tried to make it as less painful as I could. I wanted to leave the door open for them and I did not want to become their enemy. Generally after their departure would be very dark days for me personally where I would examine every dealing I had with them and their children. Yes honestly there were times some of the blame was at my door and other times it was no ones blame things just happen. But as I type this I see faces of years ago where they are I don't know but I do know this I love them yet dearly and hope for their best. Parting generally comes with such sorrow. That is my story.
I believe your sincerity and heart for your folks, Steve.
I have been a member of nine different assemblies in my adult life, I have never had a fight with a single pastor. I spoke honestly and directly to each, some were due to difference in beliefs, most were due to logistical issues, distance, etc. I remain friends and friendly with each of them when we cross paths.
I am a business owner, and involved with a significant non-profit ministry, I understand the pain of losing staff, employees, volunteers, board members and friends, for a multitude of reasons, it never feels good. But it is a fact of life, things and people change, and so as adults we can't torture ourselves unduly with it comes.
__________________ For it is written, "As I live, says the Lord every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall give praise to God. (Romans 14:11- NASB)