Yes sir... that hindsight is 20/20 ain't it bro.
I have been very unhappy where I am almost since I moved here. Not with the place so much... just with the church.
A friend of mine asked me some time ago "Why are you here".
I paused and finally answered. "I'm not sure why I am here but the fact that I am here lets me know that it is where I am supposed to be."
That is the way I believe about things that go on in our lives. I just believe that no matter where I am and no matter what I am going that it is where I am supposed to be and, if I hold on, it will eventually serve me. It may seem like my present situation is taking me to task right now... but, in the end, it will serve me because I am going to keep holding on.
Now... sometimes what I go through is where I am supposed to be because God has a work for me to do there. Sometimes what I go through is where I am supposed to be because there is something I needed to learn, something in my thinking that needed to change. At any rate... it is still where I needed to be and it will still serve me in the end.
Just recently I have experienced a totally unexpected awakening here and I am as happy as a lark (however happy larks get). We have a new pastor who I highly respect. I have jumped in with both feet and am applying myself left and right... looking for more things to get involved with and hungry for more.
I haven't felt this way in years.
But... it took 3 years of hating this place to get here.
I'm not saying that, right where you are, all is going to open up and I am certainly not saying that this won't happen either.
What I'm saying is this... where you are... is where you need to be. If God opens a door then move through it. If it moves you from that place... if it moves you back home... good. If nothing takes you away from there and things eventually open up where you are then good.
The thing is this.
You are not alone. God has not forgotten you. It will get better. You will find a place (maybe right where you are standing) where you can be happy, fulfilled and content.
I fought this place for 3 years and in ONE 24 hour period my life has taken a complete turn around. I would have gladly waited for 3 years to be where I am now. If only I had known the time scale then I could have just bided my time and waited. But I didn't.
I just had to keep doing what I had to do.
I just had to keep believing that the "good time" would come.
I just had to keep holding on long enough that this thing that was taking me for a ride would eventually break and serve me.
Reminds me of breaking in a calf or a horse.
Brother... hold on.
Brother... take hope in the fact that you are not alone and God is with you.
Brother... Remember he will never leave you nor forsaken.
Brother... I don't know when... I don't know how... but this too will pass and when it does you will testify of it many times. You will tell how hard it was and you will tell how you made it through.
You will tell how it meant to break you but now it serves you at your every whim when you tell of how HE brought you out.
My prayers are with you.