A Question About Recovery - Page 2

Elizabeth · #11 08-28-2009, 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by coadie

Left school at age 11
No computor (probably a benefit)
No outside friends
Poor health
No job or employment skills.
Mental, sexual and physical abuse.
I suspect there is stunted or thwarted development here
She can live at home and start off in a safe environment.
Just safety alone is a strong factor.
She is actually in the same condition that people fresh out of jail face except for she has a place to live.

Thank God she does have a place to live- but I suspect as you have stated she is probably stunted emotionally, and will probably need to live with a parent for long time. I think that would be the most healthy thing for her- help make up for all those lost years.

Cindy · #12 08-28-2009, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elizabeth

Thank God she does have a place to live- but I suspect as you have stated she is probably stunted emotionally, and will probably need to live with a parent for long time. I think that would be the most healthy thing for her- make up for all those lost years.

I don't think they can make up for the lost years. It is not only affecting the girl and her kids. But her mom and other family members will need help too. I just do not have the words to express how I feel about this situation. But I will be in prayer for everyone in this family.

Elizabeth · #13 08-28-2009, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindy

I don't think they can make up for the lost years. It is not only affecting the girl and her kids. But her mom and other family members will need help too. I just do not have the words to express how I feel about this situation. But I will be in prayer for everyone in this family.

Of course it could never ever make up for the lost years. But staying with a parent on her part I believe could be help in the recovery process. Of course the family will need help as well but they must feel tremendously relieved for the girl that thought they lost forever is now found- the healing process can begin.

Cindy · #14 08-28-2009, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elizabeth

Of course it could never ever make up for the lost years. But staying with a parent on her part I believe could be help in the recovery process. Of course the family will need help as well but they must feel tremendously relieved for the girl that thought they lost forever is now found- the healing process can begin.

Oh I agree, the girl and her children could not survive on their own. Her mom and other family members will probably have to finish raising them as well as starting to recover.

SeekingOne · #15 08-28-2009, 05:32 PM

Just think, she knew the man that took her longer than she knew her parents. She may not even remember much about her parents. And think about the kids, now the man they called dad and probably love is considered a bad guy. How confusing. Who knows how long it will take for them to understand the truth of the situation? Ugh!

Elizabeth · #16 08-28-2009, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindy

Oh I agree, the girl and her children could not survive on their own. Her mom and other family members will probably have to finish raising them as well as starting to recover.

Yes. I would think long term arrangements. If it were my sister or daughter, I would say the stay would be for life- or until SHE feels able to be on her own.

Elizabeth · #17 08-28-2009, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingOne

Just think, she knew the man that took her longer than she knew her parents. She may not even remember much about her parents. And think about the kids, now the man they called dad and probably love is considered a bad guy. How confusing. Who knows how long it will take for them to understand the truth of the situation? Ugh!

it will be interesting to hear her thoughts, I hope we get to hear from her. I would hope she remembers her family.

pelathais · #18 08-28-2009, 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Digging4Truth

Miss B made the following statement in the thread about the girl being found that was kidnapped 18 years ago.

My question is about the bolded portion of the statement.

Now... after going through an ordeal like this a person is far from normal. And normal, as Miss B said, will take a while to attain.

Because of their treatment there will be distrust, anger, resentment etc.

Because of their treatment there will be illogical attitudes and actions that will have to be worked through and much patience will need to be had while she works through the mental issues caused by the last 18 years of her life.

I believe that this is an expected outcome of what she has been through.

But what about people who have lived in an abusive home?

Why can't some people see that their "attitudes" and the things they do are somewhat tied to a bad home life and there is a need for patience and, just like the healing from a broken limb or a broken back, healing takes time, patience & counseling?

"Normal" is defined by a statistical average. Thus, the data point on a graph that represents "normal" is only a hypothetical value and not a "real person."

No one is "normal." We're all just plots on a graph. If your plotted position is "way out there" away from mine, then you're "weird" and abnormal. The closer you are to being like me, the closer you are to "normal" - because, hey! I'm a pretty swell guy.

ILG · #19 08-28-2009, 06:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Digging4Truth

Miss B made the following statement in the thread about the girl being found that was kidnapped 18 years ago.

My question is about the bolded portion of the statement.

Now... after going through an ordeal like this a person is far from normal. And normal, as Miss B said, will take a while to attain.

Because of their treatment there will be distrust, anger, resentment etc.

Because of their treatment there will be illogical attitudes and actions that will have to be worked through and much patience will need to be had while she works through the mental issues caused by the last 18 years of her life.

I believe that this is an expected outcome of what she has been through.

But what about people who have lived in an abusive home?

Why can't some people see that their "attitudes" and the things they do are somewhat tied to a bad home life and there is a need for patience and, just like the healing from a broken limb or a broken back, healing takes time, patience & counseling?

It's easier to judge.