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Originally Posted by tamor
Great post, Barb.
I have "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman, which is geared toward expressing commitment to your mate. I have had this one for years. It is a great book too. I have never read the one for children, but I'm sure it is written along the same lines. You can take these love languages and apply them to anyone in your life and see change.
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Thank you, tam...this thread was bumped yesterday before I heard the news report last night and this morning of the well-known actor's angry voice mail to his 11 year old daughter.
On the Today Show this morning, there was discussion that perhaps reaction to this incident is gender based...reportedly most men don't see a problem with what he had to say or the manner in which it was spoken, and most men think because of the nature of the divorce and custody battles, he was justified.
I don't know if it's a gender problem, however, hearing the voice mail several times now, I can say a number of things regarding this...
First, the battle is with the momma...not the child.
Second, even if the child is rude, is calling her a pig twice in the conversation a way of assuring a bahavorial change?!
Third, is parental exasperation an excuse for screaming and cussing in a phone message to an 11 year old?!
Fourth, what effect might the words "rude pig" have on the emotional development of an already troubled and hurting young woman?!
Surely a parent...anyone really, should be able to make a call and not fear it being broadcast on the World Wide Web, however, shouldn't one also be conscious of the fact that angry words spoken in haste cannot be retrieved?!
We can apologize and rationalize and try to make amends, and forgiveness is truly in order when asked for. But the emotional scars that can come from an outburst of uncontrolled anger or arrogance is hard to deal with sometimes.
IMHO, parental discipline is one thing, but screaming and name calling is not discipline...when does it cross a line and become abuse?!
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