Spiritual Abuse and PTSD:

[BrotherEastman]

Originally Posted by Aquila

I've tried to visit various churches and found it very difficult. I find that my emotions begin to run amok in the couple days prior to the service I've committed to attending. When I've gone my heart races, I feel hot, flushed, and almost like I can't breathe. The week after is pure "hades" in that I have panic attacks, emotional outbursts, and random crying. I've also had nightmares. However, attending a house church or "simple church" gathering doesn't do this to me. After seeing a family counselor and discussing this he said that it sounds like I suffer from a form of PTSD. He suggested a rapid eye movement therapy that calms me. Loud "preacherous" screaming causes me to feel really unsettled and like I can't breathe. I was shaking so bad after a service once (and it wasn't even a bad service) that I questioned as to if I should drive. Please note, I've also been in the military and I've had several tragedies that I experienced when I was a young man. All of these things have left their mark also. But for some reason things really get difficult when I'm attending or visiting a church.

I just feel bad, because after considering going and committing to go, I've gotten to the point where I back out at the last minute because it's so draining just thinking about it and trying to keep my myself together. As a result, my friends feel like I'm pushing them away. Sincerely, I'm not. Many of these churches are great churches, and these friends are wonderful friends.

Sometimes I sink into a deep depression after talking to a good friend who is still "in church". We'll have a wonderful conversation and everything will be going great. We're having fun, lifting up Jesus, sharing thoughts and ideas. Then they invite me to church. It starts to feel like I'm only seen as a brother in the Lord or even a friend if I attend church with them. And what's strange... they all want me to attend different churches and stress why the church they are now attending is better than the one before it. And in all honesty... I know that in five years... they'll be at yet another church! lol It makes me feel like an object as opposed to a brother or a friend.

As I looked up information on this subject I found this video about PTSD and religious abuse. So, what are your thoughts? Can religious abuse and emotional mistreatment in church cause a form of PTSD in those who experienced it?

http://www.elizabethesther.com/2012/...ual-abuse.html

Another link:

http://journeyfree.org/rts/

Another interesting link:

http://unsettledchristianity.com/201...ress-syndrome/

How should the body minister to someone who suffers from PTSD due to spiritual and/or emotional abuse inflicted on them in the church?

Aquila

I understand what you are going through. I too have had a hard childhood and I was a medic in Desert Storm. You should seek help and don't be afraid to take meds as they have helped me. I have struggled with going to church as well and my pastor doesn't seem to understand when I am not faithful to the house of God. Please do not be hard on yourself.

I have lost 2 jobs in a row because of my PTSD, hospitalized 4 times, and have tried to commit suicide twice. These problems only help you to serve better if you'll let God do His thing in your life. I believe you should go to the VA and claim PTSD as one of your ongoing problems, I have been diagnosed with 70% PTSD according to the VA guidelines.........please seek help, it only gets better and not worse. I love you Brother!

[Abiding Now]

Originally Posted by Abiding Now

J/W could the feelings be conviction or a stirring from God?

Originally Posted by Aquila

God telling me to run for my life when invited to church? lol

We'll there ya go. No need for follow up questions, God had already given you the answer to your questions.

[justlookin]

Originally Posted by Aquila

God telling me to run for my life when invited to church? lol

Could be.

[BrotherEastman]

Originally Posted by Aquila

I don't think that pastors really understand the gravity of their vocation. Broken people often come to the church to find forgiveness, acceptance, solace, healing, peace, affirmation that God does love them, hope, and a reason to live when all else has been lost. That's why it's sometimes easy to get these people often get "true believer" syndrome in the beginning. If they are indeed looking to rebuild their lives in the church... the pastor should help them realize their dreams in Christ... not hold them back or scare them into warming a pew. If their family is in trouble... the pastor shouldn't point fingers of blame... but work with them to help them turn things around. Ministry should be patient. Rarely has anyone got themselves into something overnight. It may take some time for a child of God to get various things in order.

When the very body you look to as your life preserver seemingly turns on you like wild dogs... it's traumatic. When leaders you love and trust suddenly condemn you, without even knowing all the facts, and leave you spinning and wandering what happened... it's traumatic. When family disowns you over false accusations or a misunderstanding... it can be shattering.

Chris, all I can say is that I see every point that you are coming from. Hopefully, things will work out for you. I will be praying for you my friend.

[Disciple4life]

Aquila,

I would keep going to a house church. Find the right one for you and go on a regular basis. Going to a building that has a denomination's name on a sign out front doesn't bring you closer to God. If your friends invite you to church, explain you circumstance. Tell them you have a church that meets your needs and that right now traditional churches can make your symptoms worse.

You are not alone. I deal with some of the same issues. I went the opposite way though. I attend a very large church. Nobody really knows me or my wife. We are just lost in the crowd but we still get to worship with fellow believers.

As far as the PTSD, counseling can really help. It might not go away but you can learn to work around the symptoms. Breathing exercises and journaling have helped me.

I will be praying for you.

[ILG]

Originally Posted by Aquila

My refuge became a den of vipers. In a place wherein I originally felt like I finally had safety, care, and stability... I experienced repeated disappointment, increasing disillusionment, and then emotional abuse when I reached out for help. So now, "church" can be a trigger. Even if it's a great church.

Same thing for me...