Living "unmarried" SO Baptism then Marriage or....

[Bishop Cleatus]

I'm with Ferd.

[jediwill83]

Im with Ferd as well.

[Razlin]

Go get married at a court house. Its cost me $50.
Then get baptized.

[Nitehawk013]

I lean towards Ferd. I would ask, who says you aren't married? The state because you haven't gotten their license and paid their fees?

If you have been faithfully committed to this woman for 8 years, living togetehr in what is essentially a marriage relationship, then why not just do as Aquila would say? Get a Bible and a couple witnesses, fill out the front of the Bible wher eit has the marriage page (many Bibles still have these), have the witnesses sign it, make your vow to God and then go about living just a syou are and get Baptized.

It's not like the two of you have been casually shacking up or routinely sleeping around. YOu have been in a loving, committed relationship. What is the difference between what you have already been doing and another person's marriage? Besides a piece of paper from the state?

Worry about getting baptized and then start the process of getting a simple wedding doen if you feel you must to "legitimize" your relationship. Personally I think we are a bit skewed in our OP position that unless you have a license from the state you are not married. If you are living a marriage relationship faithfully, then IMO you are married in God's eyes even if the state doesn't give you a license.

[NewbieMisfits]

but...
no I dont care so much about the papers as I do making the commitment before God.. one flesh and all that jazz...

i would not have been convicted about fixing it if it was good enough as is....

time will tell very shortly what happens, and I pray it is any option not of the "you gotta go" plan.

[crakjak]

Originally Posted by LifeUncommon

You need to separate. You don't have to break up, but you shouldn't be cohabitating before marriage.

Nonsense, they should just get start getting it all done. They have been living together for 8 years, what is the point???

Yes, get with pastor and be married ASAP, then get legally married ASAP, all the other stuff is just goofy, meaningless religious stuff. Except for the baptism.

What they did before coming to Christ is all under the blood, they have repented, no need to complicate matters by separating. All that come to Christ began a process, they are already physical married or have become one, separating is not necessary.

[crakjak]

Originally Posted by NewbieMisfits

I find that funny as I told her it would be nice to have a real... real... real... small ceremony before service then be baptized after service

dont see any honeymoon in the plans though, life is busy with skeewl and what not

Good plan, do it next service.

[Aquila]

Baptism was commanded with regards to salvation.

Sin can be forgiven.

I'd get baptized first and then contend with any sin or temptation as it comes. After all... isn't that what we do in every other area of life?

[n david]

Originally Posted by NewbieMisfits

I find that funny as I told her it would be nice to have a real... real... real... small ceremony before service then be baptized after service

I like it!

[Aquila]

I'm also with Ferd. I don't believe one has to have a "civil marriage" in the eyes of the state to be married in the eyes of God. However, to be married in the eyes of God there must be a binding commitment, even if private. If you want a ceremony, have a pastor perform one. Or... you can "self-officiate" like the Quakers do. If you do this prior to squaring up with a state marriage later... you should at the very least draft a cohabitation agreement.

Here's a beautiful video of a self-officiated "Quaker Wedding" (Marriage for Grown-Ups):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ae8fmy4oGg