I am going to respectfully lay the cards on the table when I come back. It may be a bit awkward to discuss both topics (his tithing sermon and the possibility of my family movig to another church), but it looks like that is where we are headed.
I am going to quote him on certain comments he made during his recent tithing sermon, admit that those comments left us needing clarificaton, and ask him to clarify his remarks. If he truly feels that financial troubles always result from a lack of giving, then I will respectfully remind him that my calamities came after a year and a half of tithing the gross of my BUSINESS income. If he blows that off, or just shrugs. then i will not argue. I will simply shift gears to the next topic., my family assisting the smaller , nearby struggling church, and explain to him the logical reasons we should do so.
I will not accept any "gas money" just to be able to show up on Wednesday nights to stare at the back of someone's head. That really would not be a prudent use of the church's money, and would make me feel beholden at this point. All the signs are apparent that I am on my way out. No invitations to preach for a whole year (that after being 'the go to guy'), no welcome back greetings from the pulpit after being out of the country for 2 months, and my name has not been reinstated for various platform funtions that I normally did for the duration of my time here prior to leaving for Mexico in mid June. it would seem that I'm being considered "unreliable" and am being kicked to the curb.
Last edited by Originalist; 10-01-2013 at 07:55 AM.
I am going to respectfully lay the cards on the table when I come back. It may be a bit awkward to discuss both topics (his tithing sermon and the possibility of my family movig to another church), but it looks like that is where we are headed.
I am going to quote him on certain comments he made during his recent tithing sermon, admitthat those comments left us needing clarificaton, and ask him to clarify his remarks. If he truly feels that financial troubles always result from a lack of giving, then I will respectfully remind him that my calamities came after a year and a half of tithing the gross of my BUSINESS income. If he blows that off, or just shrugs. then i will not argue. I will simply shift gears to the next topic., my family assisting the smaller , nearby struggling church, and explain to him the logical reasons we should do so.
I will not accept any "gas money" just to be able to show up on Wednesday nights to stare at the back of someone's head. That really would not be a prudent use of the church's money, and would make me feel beholden at this point. All the signs are apparent that I am on my way out. No invitations to preach for a while year (that after being 'the go to guy), no welcome back greetings from the pulpit after being out of the country for 2 months, and my name has not been reinstated for various platform funtions that I normally did for the duration of my time here prior to leaving for Mexico in mid June. it would seem that I'm being considered "unreliable" and am being kicked to the curb.
Yeah it does seem you are being snubbed.
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Now this is just me... but if I were leaving, I wouldnt go into much.
You arent going to change his preaching. You arent going to get him to see things your way. so why rehash it all?
I would just point out that there is a church close by that you feel led to help. That you are moving your family over there and God Bless and Godspeed.
you arent going to get points for showing this man the error of his ways, but you will lead him to think poorly of you so.
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Now this is just me... but if I were leaving, I wouldnt go into much.
You arent going to change his preaching. You arent going to get him to see things your way. so why rehash it all?
I would just point out that there is a church close by that you feel led to help. That you are moving your family over there and God Bless and Godspeed.
you arent going to get points for showing this man the error of his ways, but you will lead him to think poorly of you so.
Sermon fodder, Brother Ferd!!!!!
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Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand. (Romans 14:4)
Scripture is its own interpreter. Nothing can cut a diamond but a diamond. Nothing can interpret Scripture but Scripture" Thomas Watson.
All the signs are apparent that I am on my way out. No invitations to preach for a whole year (that after being 'the go to guy'), ... it would seem that I'm being considered "unreliable" and am being kicked to the curb.
While your Pastor may well have an issue against you, what's mentioned above shouldn't be considered a snub.
In a previous post, you stated that for several months, you were only able to make it to church once a week. I don't know of many Pastors who would ask someone to preach if they were only able to attend one service a week. It's nothing against you personally. There are others in the church besides your Pastor who saw that you were only making it to one service a week -- this, after having been so involved as you said you were. How would it appear to them if you were asked to preach? I understand it's not fair and it's not indicative of your walk with God; however, it's hard to preach and be effective when other saints see you're only there once a week.
I went from a church were I was an assistant to the Pastor (emphasis was made on the "to the") and preached several times a month, due to his schedule; to not preaching at all the first three years where I currently am, and then preaching once in 2011 and once in 2012 -- although I did preach twice this year due to my Pastor having surgery and being limited for a couple weeks. Sometimes you just have to be patient and wait on God.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Originalist
From November 2012 to April 2013, I worked 7 days a week between my two part time jobs. I was only able to make it to church one service a week. My participation in ministry came to a halt. I literally had 2 days off during that 5 month period. We have only one car, and for those 5 months the only time my wife left the house was when we went to church.
While your Pastor may well have an issue against you, what's mentioned above shouldn't be considered a snub.
In a previous post, you stated that for several months, you were only able to make it to church once a week. I don't know of many Pastors who would ask someone to preach if they were only able to attend one service a week. It's nothing against you personally. There are others in the church besides your Pastor who saw that you were only making it to one service a week -- this, after having been so involved as you said you were. How would it appear to them if you were asked to preach? I understand it's not fair and it's not indicative of your walk with God; however, it's hard to preach and be effective when other saints see you're only there once a week.
I went from a church were I was an assistant to the Pastor (emphasis was made on the "to the") and preached several times a month, due to his schedule; to not preaching at all the first three years where I currently am, and then preaching once in 2011 and once in 2012 -- although I did preach twice this year due to my Pastor having surgery and being limited for a couple weeks. Sometimes you just have to be patient and wait on God.
There were 5 months my work schedule only allowed me to attend on service a month, and two months I was out of the country. That is seven months total. What about the other 5 months?
Now this is just me... but if I were leaving, I wouldnt go into much.
You arent going to change his preaching. You arent going to get him to see things your way. so why rehash it all?
I would just point out that there is a church close by that you feel led to help. That you are moving your family over there and God Bless and Godspeed.
you arent going to get points for showing this man the error of his ways, but you will lead him to think poorly of you so.
Great advice really. You'll just become sermon fodder as NG has already pointed out. Keeping it simple, and not pointing any fingers at him will go a long way at keeping your relationship at least civil in the future.
Quote:
Originally Posted by navygoat1998
Sermon fodder, Brother Ferd!!!!!
Yes... exactly what will happen if you "bare your soul"...
My advice matches Ferd's ... say as little as possible, keep it as positive as possible realizing that you are not going to change him, and just move on with as much civility and kindness as possible.
Praying for ya! I totally get the sensitive nature of what you're trying to do, we've been there... done that... and your family is in our prayers
There were 5 months my work schedule only allowed me to attend on service a month, and two months I was out of the country. That is seven months total. What about the other 5 months?
I don't know why he didn't the other 5 months. I do know from experience at previous churches and my current church, there are times when good, Godly men aren't asked to preach for a while. It's nothing against these men, it's just how it is.
In the church where my father was the Pastor, unless there was a special service with an evangelist or missionary, he preached every Sunday morning, evening and Wednesday evening. And he had an assistant Pastor, a student pastor, my brother was licensed, another young man was working for his license, and I was there. He had several others who were capable of giving the message, but it was rare they were asked to do so.
My current church has myself and at least 3 others, possibly 4, who have been in ministry and have taught or preached in the past. Until I gave back to back messages last month, there were several months since someone else besides the Pastor had given a message. Most mid-weeks he goes through an in-depth series on a book in the Bible or a certain topic; and most Sundays are based on a series as well, though more expository and evangelistic than mid-week services.
Now this is just me... but if I were leaving, I wouldnt go into much.
You arent going to change his preaching. You arent going to get him to see things your way. so why rehash it all?
I would just point out that there is a church close by that you feel led to help. That you are moving your family over there and God Bless and Godspeed.
you arent going to get points for showing this man the error of his ways, but you will lead him to think poorly of you so.
Good post. Especially the correct spelling of "led".
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