Looking for a church

Titus2woman · #1 02-02-2012, 11:59 AM

We are currently 'church shopping' which I always heard as a bad phrase but now has a new meaning for me. I comparison shop every other major decision in my life... where to live, where to apply for work, what home, car, etc. to buy... So I've applied those same standards to church with questions like:

Does the leadership and membership exhibit the fruits of the spirit?

Is there a place for interaction? Are differences treated respectfully?

Does it meet my own and my families current needs and will it meet our needs in the future?

Is it economical? Coming from very money hungry church with big expansion plans that put a huge burden on the membership, this is important to me.

Is there a place for us to perform Christian service?

Is bible doctrine taught? Do I agree with the way it is taught?

Do I feel comfortable with the worship style?

I was taught in my UPC church that God put me where I was and that if it was not comfortable then it was me that needed to change "church should change you, you should not change the church"... well... now I just don't believe that is always the case.

Of course I have liberaly bathed the situation in prayer and continue to do so but I'd like to hear from some of you who will be the hands, feet and voice... about what you would look for if you found yourself in the position of looking for a new church home where perhaps your current denomination or affiliation either didn't exist or was much different than your normal.

TIA

The Matt · #2 02-02-2012, 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titus2woman

We are currently 'church shopping' which I always heard as a bad phrase but now has a new meaning for me. I comparison shop every other major decision in my life... where to live, where to apply for work, what home, car, etc. to buy... So I've applied those same standards to church with questions like:

Does the leadership and membership exhibit the fruits of the spirit?

Is there a place for interaction? Are differences treated respectfully?

Does it meet my own and my families current needs and will it meet our needs in the future?

Is it economical? Coming from very money hungry church with big expansion plans that put a huge burden on the membership, this is important to me.

Is there a place for us to perform Christian service?

Is bible doctrine taught? Do I agree with the way it is taught?

Do I feel comfortable with the worship style?

I was taught in my UPC church that God put me where I was and that if it was not comfortable then it was me that needed to change "church should change you, you should not change the church"... well... now I just don't believe that is always the case.

Of course I have liberaly bathed the situation in prayer and continue to do so but I'd like to hear from some of you who will be the hands, feet and voice... about what you would look for if you found yourself in the position of looking for a new church home where perhaps your current denomination or affiliation either didn't exist or was much different than your normal.

TIA

One thing to remember is people are human...You may get a few that you don't particularly love as much as some if you catch my drift...but you'll NEVER find "that perfect church".

RandyWayne · #3 02-02-2012, 12:06 PM

While doctrine and the way it is taught is certainly the number one criteria to us, and should be to anyone, a huge issue for us is finding the right sized church we're comfortable with. Many churches in the Phoenix valley are either very small (25 to 50 members total and have been that size for decades) or very large with most having well over a thousand attending each service with two or more services on a Sunday morning. I don't think there is anything wrong with a big church but I tell my wife that I don't want to go somewhere were we could go for 10 years then suddenly stop, and no one would notice our absence.

Titus2woman · #4 02-02-2012, 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Matt

One thing to remember is people are human...You may get a few that you don't particularly love as much as some if you catch my drift...but you'll NEVER find "that perfect church".

Personalities are not a big deal for us. We are both very tolerant of differences. Our work and our farm bring us into contact with a very wide variety of personality types daily. Only nasty judgemental people kind of rock my boat and hubby is not even bothered by that... the rest is all good.

Titus2woman · #5 02-02-2012, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

While doctrine and the way it is taught is certainly the number one criteria to us, and should be to anyone, a huge issue for us is finding the right sized church we're comfortable with. Many churches in the Phoenix valley are either very small (25 to 50 members total and have been that size for decades) or very large with most having well over a thousand attending each service with two or more services on a Sunday morning. I don't think there is anything wrong with a big church but I tell my wife that I don't want to go somewhere were we could go for 10 years then suddenly stop, and no one would notice our absence.

I'm with you on this... I have Goldilocks syndrome with size of an assembly.

The Matt · #6 02-02-2012, 12:10 PM

I personally like a small church, I find people get closer. The less you have, the more you appreciate what you have. Eh...sometimes.

RandyWayne · #7 02-02-2012, 12:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titus2woman

I'm with you on this... I have Goldilocks syndrome with size of an assembly.

It sounds like I am picky about it -I'm really not, but we have such extremes with very little between them. Almost nothing in the 100-300 attendance range.

Amanah · #8 02-02-2012, 12:17 PM

What I would look for in a church

•Church is open for early morning prayer before work and other times, and people are interested in meeting to pray

•Church has organized outreach: feeding people, visiting the sick, elderly, those in prison

•New people are coming in and are receiving the Holy Ghost and being Baptized in Jesus name

•Pastor teaches on various topics from the Bible to help people live strong Christian lives

•People are not judged by how they appear, Biblical modesty is preached but there is no enforcement, no judgmental attitudes

•If it’s not in the Bible, It’s not preached

seekerman · #9 02-02-2012, 06:13 PM

Actually what you're looking for isn't a church, you're wanting a building based hierarchy with little or no resemblance to the early NT church. You should be able to find one though since, by some estimates, there are 30,000+ such building based religious systems out there.

Titus2woman · #10 02-02-2012, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seekerman

Actually what you're looking for isn't a church, you're wanting a building based hierarchy with little or no resemblance to the early NT church. You should be able to find one though since, by some estimates, there are 30,000+ such building based religious systems out there.

I think you've confused me with someone else but thanks, I think....

Oh, and just for grins how do you describe a church? I'm all ears