Question on Romans 12:20

[Pressing-On]

I am seeing three separate views on this passage. My question, which one is right?

Two translations:

Romans 2:19-20 “Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.

Quoted from Proverbs 25:21-22 “If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee.

The New Living Translation has it this way, and the ONLY translation that has added the word “shame” to the passage: “Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, "I will take revenge; I will pay them back," says the LORD. Instead, "If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads."

Shame in the Greek - “disgrace and/or dishonesty”.

We would then be saying- "...In doing this, you will heap burning coals of disgrace on their heads." Can't see that being right.

Of course, in the Webster’s, which is a place I never go to study the Bible and appears to be where the definition for the NLT is coming from, it defines Shame as – “NOUN - a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior."

I have read through several Commentaries. The only agreement they have is that the meaning is obscure. They then go on to publish what they believe the verse to be saying.

Interpretation 1:

I understand that many side with the meaning to be – extending your hand of help to the enemy, you then put him in a place of shame to reflect on their evil actions toward you in order to feel remorse and to possibly repent. Whether they do or not, God rewards you for trying.

I acknowledge that David’s kindness to Saul softened his heart on a couple of occasions. (I Samuel 24:1-22; 26:1-15)

Interpretation 2:

Some have said it is a “clever” use to refer to “coals of fire” as relating to an eastern practice of carrying things on one’s head. If someone’s fire went out, a friend or neighbor would give him coals to relight his fire, heaping them in a pan on his head, i.e., feeding an enemy is like giving him coals for his fire.

Coals of Fire – Romans 12:20
The Scriptures have much to say about forgiving our enemies. Paul says that if we give food and drink to our enemies, “we shall be heaping coals of fire on their heads.” To us this doesn’t sound like forgiveness, but like taking vengeance. In the Bible lands almost everything is carried on the head – water jars, baskets of fruit, vegetables, fish or any other article. Those carrying the burden rarely touch it with the hands, and they walk through crowded streets and lanes with perfect ease. In many homes the only fire they have is kept in a brazier which they use for simple cooking as well as for warmth. They plan to always keep it burning. If it should go out, some member of the family will take the brazier to a neighbor’s house to borrow fire. Then she will lift the brazier to her head and start for home. If her neighbor is a generous woman, she will heap the brazier full of coals. To feed an enemy and give him drink was like heaping the empty brazier with live coals, - which meant food, warmth, and was the symbol of finest generosity.
Strange Scripture – Barbara M. Bowen, pages 31-32

Sometimes a person’s fire went out and he needed to borrow some live coals to restart his fire. Giving a person coals in a pan to carry home “on his head” was a neighborly, kind act; it made friends, not enemies. – Bible Knowledge Commentary

Interpretation 3:

This metaphor refers to the ancient practice of smelting ore for precious metals. Applying heat to ore would cause the desired metals to melt and run free from the slag and dross. While ore was always put over fire for obtaining the precious contents, blazing coals were sometimes poured over the ore to increase the heat even more. Genuine and sincere kindness, unnatural and unexpected may melt a personal enemy, i.e., “A soft answer turns away wrath; But grievous words stir up anger.” Proverbs 15:1

Jesus says in Matthew 5:43 “Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;”

Instruction on being the better person is shown in Exodus 23:4-5, “If thou meet thine enemy's ox or his ass going astray, thou shalt surely bring it back to him again. If thou see the ass of him that hateth thee lying under his burden, and wouldest forbear to help him, thou shalt surely help with him.” Exodus goes on with a proper view of justice.

In conclusion: My only argument would be to steer clear of using Romans 2:20 and walking a very fine line of vengeance being an underlying tone or motive. I don’t see God rewarding that view.

In my opinion, using the NLT, I don’t see how a person wouldn’t have some degree of vengeance, a very minuscule or even so much as denying they have it.

I see God instructing us to do good without ever wanting or expecting anything from our enemy as per Matthew 5:43. The coals of fire, IMO, have to be viewed as something done for the good of the person as per interpretation 2 and 3. And, perhaps as with David and Saul, it is cause and effect, but it wasn’t David’s motive.