Things "Another Jesus" Might Say

[Sean]

For as the Roman armies cometh out of the east, and shineth even unto the west; so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.







LOLOLOL

[Sean]

Or......


For as the lightning cometh out of the east, and shineth even unto the west; so shall also the coming of the Roman armies be.




LOLOLOLOL

[votivesoul]

Another Jesus, high school yearbook edition:

Always stay the same and just believe in yourself because the kingdom of God is like, really, really far away, okay?

[shazeep]

"Obey Acts 2:38 and speak in tongues, or you are lost."

[J.A. Perez]

Then Peter said unto them just receive Christ as lord and savior, and your sins will be forgiven and washed away and you will have the Holy Spirit.

[votivesoul]

It's really sad when a post like this, which was intended to edify and bring some stark clarity to the words of the Messiah, is used as a whipping post to try and string up some of the members here for a lashing.

[deacon blues]

Originally Posted by votivesoul

It's really sad when a post like this, which was intended to edify and bring some stark clarity to the words of the Messiah, is used as a whipping post to try and string up some of the members here for a lashing.

I don't recall there being any Scripture remotely close to this one anywhere in the Bible. Chapter and verse please?

[deacon blues]

Then Peter said unto them, Repent with true tearful and loathesome angst, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ being fully immersed by a Oneness preacher for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost with initial evidence of speaking in other tongues, living an overcoming life free from all jewelry, make-up, pants on women, with hair on women uncut, no facial hair on men, devoid of bowling, movie theaters, organized sports and professional sporting events, amusement parks, carnivals, or county fairs, no wedding rings, sleeves long enough to cover the elbow, no card games, games with dice, Old Maid, or Monopoly, no television, rented movies from Red Box, nor any Hollywood produced entertainment, and then maybe just maybe if you call on the name of the Lord you might be saved.

[Cracker Barrel]

Originally Posted by deacon blues

Then Peter said unto them, Repent with true tearful and loathesome angst, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ being fully immersed by a Oneness preacher for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost with initial evidence of speaking in other tongues, living an overcoming life free from all jewelry, make-up, pants on women, with hair on women uncut, no facial hair on men, devoid of bowling, movie theaters, organized sports and professional sporting events, amusement parks, carnivals, or county fairs, no wedding rings, sleeves long enough to cover the elbow, no card games, games with dice, Old Maid, or Monopoly, no television, rented movies from Red Box, nor any Hollywood produced entertainment, and then maybe just maybe if you call on the name of the Lord you might be saved.

The line and precept of the word teach us that these are what identify Apostolic. If you don believe this you are lost my friend and you are not apostolic. Very lolo!
God i givim truth ia long yumi, False doctrine ee cause'm plenty sick 'long Pentikos people today.
God has given us this truth, but false doctrine has destroyed many Pentecostal people in our day.
Not happy to read this mokery, a deacon should have more sense.

[deacon blues]

Originally Posted by Cracker Barrel

The line and precept of the word teach us that these are what identify Apostolic. If you don believe this you are lost my friend and you are not apostolic. Very lolo!
God i givim truth ia long yumi, False doctrine ee cause'm plenty sick 'long Pentikos people today.
God has given us this truth, but false doctrine has destroyed many Pentecostal people in our day.
Not happy to read this mokery, a deacon should have more sense.

It's not a mockery---it's a bright spotlight on the sad, deceptive, and manipulative doctrine taught to poor souls who are hungry for God but aren't given the simplicity and the power of the TRUE Gospel of Jesus Christ! Adding unbearable yokes to new believers and discipling them to believe these things "keep" you saved or help you to "stay saved" is entirely unbiblical and false. If you tell people they have to do these things or not do these things to be saved you should humble yourself and repent. Shame on you! Preach Christ and Him crucified!