I noticed the dire absence of a current joke thread on AFF. Why so serious?
Pelosi will be speaker until she is something else and nothing we can do will change that. Obame is president regardless of his birth cert and will be until he isn't. The health care reform will happen or it won't. People with conservative standards will have them still, people with not-so-conservative standards will have them still.
Three steppers will three step and one steppers might take three even if they don't believe it necessary and on.
But Jokes... who can argue with a joke?
Never try to outsmart Dad
A young boy had just got his driver's license and asked his dad if they could discuss his use of the car.
His father said he'd make a deal with his son. "If you bring your grades up from C to B, study your Bible and get your hair cut .... then we'll talk about you borrowing the car."
The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer and they agreed on it.
After about six weeks his father said, "Son, I'm really proud of you. You've brought your grades up and I've been watching you studying your Bible. However, I'm a bit disappointed that you haven't had your hair cut."
The lad paused a moment then said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's a strong argument that Jesus had long hair
To which his father replied, "Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?"
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Last edited by John Atkinson; 08-13-2009 at 06:37 AM.
A certain king was touring his kingdom and decided to stop at the biggest prison in the land. He had all the inmates gather outside and said " If any of you feel that you're innocent of your crime or here unjustly than bow down to me." All the prisoners bowed down except for one who was still standing. The king had him brought over and asked, " Why did you not bow down?" To which the man answered " Because, your Majesty, I am guilty, I did what I did,was caught, was tried and sentenced lawfully and am serving my rightful sentence." The king was astonished and dismissed the man. He than called for the chief jailer and told him to release the one that remained standing. After he released him he asked the king "Why did you let that one go free?" The king answered " Why, we can't have that one guilty man corrupting all the "innocent" in here, can we?"
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His banner over me is LOVE.... My soul followeth hard after thee....Love one another with a pure heart fervently. Jesus saith unto her, Said I not unto thee, that, if thou wouldest believe, thou shouldest see the glory of God?
To be a servant of God, it will cost us our total commitment to God, and God alone. His burden must be our burden... Sis Alvear
And I will continue to argue with any joke that finds humor in a person drowning, especially if a part of the joke is intentionally holding a lady underwater.
And if every single person on this forum thinks a joke like that is funny, and if every single person hits me hard for objecting to it, I'll still object to it.
__________________ Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? Will God? No! HE IS THE ONE who has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? Will Christ Jesus? No, for HE IS THE ONE who died for us and was raised to life for us and is sitting at the place of highest honor next to God, pleading for us. (Romans 8:33-34)
"The greatest enemy to the movement of Jesus Christ is Christianity". –Erwin McManus
Hmm. "Arguing with a joke" is silly, eh? It wouldn't be hard to find a joke or two that would (and should) get me some infractions and/or a banning. And it would have nothing to do with murder.
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Hebrews 13:23 Know ye that our brother Timothy is set at liberty
And I will continue to argue with any joke that finds humor in a person drowning, especially if a part of the joke is intentionally holding a lady underwater.
And if every single person on this forum thinks a joke like that is funny, and if every single person hits me hard for objecting to it, I'll still object to it.
Good! You have a backbone!!! ...but try to get a funny bone.
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His banner over me is LOVE.... My soul followeth hard after thee....Love one another with a pure heart fervently. Jesus saith unto her, Said I not unto thee, that, if thou wouldest believe, thou shouldest see the glory of God?
To be a servant of God, it will cost us our total commitment to God, and God alone. His burden must be our burden... Sis Alvear
Hmm. "Arguing with a joke" is silly, eh? It wouldn't be hard to find a joke or two that would (and should) get me some infractions and/or a banning. And it would have nothing to do with murder.
Oh, I just remembered, I did get an infraction for a joke, once. It was about TV.
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Hebrews 13:23 Know ye that our brother Timothy is set at liberty
Hmm. "Arguing with a joke" is silly, eh? It wouldn't be hard to find a joke or two that would (and should) get me some infractions and/or a banning. And it would have nothing to do with murder.
Rich apostolic guy figures out how to take it with him when he goes, so he converts all his assets to gold and is buried with it.
He arrives at the pearly gate dragging an obviously very heavy sack. Peter steps up and asks the guy "Whats in the bag?" The guy smiles and opens the sack for Peter's perusal.
Peter then looks up at the guy with a puzzled expression and says "wow... you brought pavement".
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Last edited by John Atkinson; 08-13-2009 at 02:45 PM.