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  #11  
Old 07-13-2011, 02:24 PM
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scotty scotty is offline
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Location: Arkansas
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Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Quote:
Originally Posted by houston View Post
Mmkay
yeah, I hated literature.
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You can't reach the world with your talents. People are sick and tired of religious talents. People need a Holy Ghost annointed church with real fruits to reach out and touch their lives. ~ Pastor Burrell Crabtree

In fact I think that the insinuation of "hateful" Pentecostals is coming mostly from the fertile imaginations of bitter, backslidden ex Apostolics who are constantly trying to find a way to justify their actions. ~ strait shooter


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  #12  
Old 07-13-2011, 02:59 PM
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Praxeas Praxeas is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 45,794
Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Jacobs Ladder has a girl friend named Lulu
Whose breath, he would say, smelled like poopoo
He slipped her the tongue
And thought it was fun
But now his breath stink like hers too too
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Let it be understood that Apostolic Friends Forum is an Apostolic Forum.
Apostolic is defined on AFF as:


  1. There is One God. This one God reveals Himself distinctly as Father, Son and Holy Ghost.
  2. The Son is God himself in a human form or "God manifested in the flesh" (1Tim 3:16)
  3. Every sinner must repent of their sins.
  4. That Jesus name baptism is the only biblical mode of water baptism.
  5. That the Holy Ghost is for today and is received by faith with the initial evidence of speaking in tongues.
  6. The saint will go on to strive to live a holy life, pleasing to God.
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  #13  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:04 PM
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Adam Adam is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 687
Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Houston is a man, you see
With a hat with a capital B
But when he's gotta go
Most people don't know
That he has to sit down to pee
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  #14  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:45 PM
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BeenThinkin BeenThinkin is offline
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Location: Texas
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Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Jacob's Ladder came out of the closet I hear
With a look on his face like a sneer!
He wanted a lovely lady he said
But wouldn't post a picture, that's bad!
Which left all the beauties hiding in fear!
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"From the time you're born, 'til you ride in the hearse, there ain't nothing bad that couldn't be worse!"

LIFE: Some days you're the dog and some days you're the hydrant!

I have ... Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia! The fear of long words.

"Prediction is very hard, especially about the future." - Yogi Berra

"I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave in reflection." - Thomas Paine
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  #15  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:56 PM
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Cindy Cindy is offline
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Location: Texas
Posts: 26,537
Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Good grief, what is wrong with y'all?
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If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV

Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
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  #16  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:58 PM
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scotty scotty is offline
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Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cindy View Post
Good grief, what is wrong with y'all?
Boredom at its best.
__________________
You can't reach the world with your talents. People are sick and tired of religious talents. People need a Holy Ghost annointed church with real fruits to reach out and touch their lives. ~ Pastor Burrell Crabtree

In fact I think that the insinuation of "hateful" Pentecostals is coming mostly from the fertile imaginations of bitter, backslidden ex Apostolics who are constantly trying to find a way to justify their actions. ~ strait shooter


www.scottysweb.com
www.chrisscottonline.com
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  #17  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:59 PM
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Cindy Cindy is offline
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Location: Texas
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Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Quote:
Originally Posted by scotty View Post
Boredom at its best.
Stupidity at it's worst. And I am about to do some head smacking.
__________________
If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV

Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
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  #18  
Old 07-13-2011, 04:12 PM
houston houston is offline
Isaiah 56:4-5


 
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Location: SOUTH ZION
Posts: 11,307
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adam
Houston is a man, you see
With a hat with a capital B
But when he's gotta go
Most people don't know
That he has to sit down to pee
I wouldn't mind if this was posted by one of my AFF friends. But I do mind...
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  #19  
Old 07-13-2011, 04:17 PM
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Hoovie Hoovie is offline
Supercalifragilisticexpiali...


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 19,197
Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacob's Ladder View Post
Hoovie, the flatulent geek
He's a cretinous slob and a sneak
He's a snot and a ham
An illiterate sham
And a miscreant, insolent freak
Quote:
Originally Posted by scotty View Post
Hoovie touts big horns
boastful and full of vain
stars on reality t.v.
gloating in Hollywood fame
while his own reality is fully
just a forum bully
NICE!

Now I will ban thee both for name calling ... or something.

Jacob and Scotty have the great one dissed
Ladders and Chipmunks will surely be missed
Good riddance to your babble
On AFF they no more dabble
Hoovie was right - class dismissed
__________________
"It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity." Dave Barry 2005

I am a firm believer in the Old Paths

Articles on such subjects as "The New Birth," will be accepted, whether they teach that the new birth takes place before baptism in water and Spirit, or that the new birth consists of baptism of water and Spirit. - THE PENTECOSTAL HERALD Dec. 1945

"It is doubtful if any Trinitarian Pentecostals have ever professed to believe in three gods, and Oneness Pentecostals should not claim that they do." - Daniel Segraves

Last edited by Hoovie; 07-13-2011 at 04:20 PM.
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  #20  
Old 07-13-2011, 04:41 PM
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Praxeas Praxeas is offline
Go Dodgers!


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 45,794
Re: Funny AFF Limericks

Cindy is a lass who is pretty
Before she became an old bitty
She lacks Praxeas style
but has a nice smile
Though she wishes that she was more witty
__________________
Let it be understood that Apostolic Friends Forum is an Apostolic Forum.
Apostolic is defined on AFF as:


  1. There is One God. This one God reveals Himself distinctly as Father, Son and Holy Ghost.
  2. The Son is God himself in a human form or "God manifested in the flesh" (1Tim 3:16)
  3. Every sinner must repent of their sins.
  4. That Jesus name baptism is the only biblical mode of water baptism.
  5. That the Holy Ghost is for today and is received by faith with the initial evidence of speaking in tongues.
  6. The saint will go on to strive to live a holy life, pleasing to God.
Reply With Quote
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