Why are some x-UPCers so set on bashing the UPC???

[Malvaro]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

I was in the UPC for 20 yrs and have been out for 10+. I am not one to BASH the org. I will call 'em like I see 'em with the UPC and other orgs and independents as well. The worst thing, from my viewpoint is un-christian behavior in the name of "truth" whether lib or con. People are quick to let their spirits be seen in how they handle disagreements.

I learned many good things in the UPC!!! I also learned the art of religious politics, which I now despise. Unfortunately, it is still alive and well in the org and other orgs for that matter. One good reason I don't belong to any org currently even though there are some good ones out there!

religious politics is definately alive and well.... in many, many organizations....

MOW, being out of any org, what method do you use to remain accountable in doctrine/belief/etc.... do you have an elder/mentor/etc in your ministry to look to???

[Revelationist]

Originally Posted by Pianoman

I think you should define "friend". I think what some folks call "friends" are really "aquaintences".

I would think a true friend would stick through thick and thin.

Felicity, the post right above yours said this... then your message was right under it saying that they were friends in ever sense of the word... Putting the two messages together, I got a chuckle out of it.... I did read your post. : )

[Rhoni]

I was in the UPCI 40 years of the 49 years I have been alive and I will say that Pianoman is right...true friends are friends no matter what. When we had church trouble and we turned in our UPCI license...we were ostracised and friends fled...we had 2 or 3 left but compared to all those we thought were friends...well, it opened my eyes and what I saw hurt me to the core.

Now I realize that it wasn't that they didn't like us but were only 'fair-weather' friends...when you go through the fire...there is only one man there in the fire with you..and he is the son of God!

Blessings, Rhoni

[Felicity]

Look .......... the TRUTH of the matter is this .........

I've done the same thing in the past. I was never unkind but have walked past men and women who had left the UPC with just a smile and a nod of the head.

One of my friends who was raised UPC later on dropped the standards that I was still holding at that time, and I remember talking with her in the mall one evening and asking her how she could do what she did. Didn't she feel convicted? How could she let down like that.

I know how it goes. I know how it works. That's why I can't be too judgmental toward others who felt the same about me after I "changed".

There are reasons why people do the things they do and act the way they act.

I'm just thankful to know that many of the people I fellowshipped with when we were UPC still think about me and ask about me and love me.

[Lost]

I see that some arguments never change. Another UPC vs x-UPC thread.

[LaVonne]

Originally Posted by Felicity

Look .......... the TRUTH of the matter is this .........

I've done the same thing in the past. I was never unkind but have walked past men and women who had left the UPC with just a smile and a nod of the head.

One of my friends who was raised UPC later on dropped the standards that I was still holding at that time, and I remember talking with her in the mall one evening and asking her how she could do what she did. Didn't she feel convicted? How could she let down like that.

I know how it goes. I know how it works. That's why I can't be too judgmental toward others who felt the same about me after I "changed".

There are reasons why people do the things they do and act the way they act.

I'm just thankful to know that many of the people I fellowshipped with when we were UPC still think about me and ask about me and love me.

Felicity,

I've hurt those that I was once close to that let down the standard as well. I feel badly about it and have apologised for my wrong doings. Now, when I see ex UPC'ers I really try hard to not treat them any differently. In fact, I ran into some just recently and we had a really nice visit. It's hard on both sides, don't you think?

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by CareyM

Felicity,

I've hurt those that I was once close to that let down the standard as well. I feel badly about it and have apologised for my wrong doings. Now, when I see ex UPC'ers I really try hard to not treat them any differently. In fact, I ran into some just recently and we had a really nice visit. It's hard on both sides, don't you think?

I am not Felicity but I do have an opinion on this matter...

I do think it is difficult on both sides. It is difficult to project what one will say or do if one is put into similar circumstances.

Here is a real example: After we had turned in our UPCI license, a letter went out to all those licensed in the state of Indiana that they were not to eat, speak with, or preach for us because we chose to return from Florida to Pastor a split off the UPCI church where we had resigned from.

I hosted a mother and daughter banquet for Mother's Day that year and we had over 150 ladies scheduled to attend, a fashion show made up of children from the church and children's modest fashions. There were mothers being honored by their daughters, and I asked my personal friend, a UPCI minister's wife to speak for us. One week before the event was to occur...the District Superintendent was contacted by the current Pastor of the local UPCI church that another UPCI minister's wife was going to speak for us and he didn't like it. The DS called her husband and forbade her to speak. She called me sobbing saying what I have disclosed here. She was hurt and so was I.

I asked my mother-in-law to speak on the Older women's role in the church, and I spoke on the younger women's role in the church. The banquet went off without a hitch and it was beautiful and we had an excellent time. It was years later, after divorce, and education, that the former Pastor's wife, my former friend was free to tell me exactly what happened and how she felt. It was healing.

Many put in this position are obligated to submit to the authority over them, even if the authority is wrong. The Bible tells us that..."Obedience is better than sacrifice.." God restored our friendship but it was sad on both sides of the fence. I hope more wisdom and understanding reigns within our ranks than in the past.

Blessings, Rhoni

[Malvaro]

Originally Posted by Malvaro

religious politics is definately alive and well.... in many, many organizations....

MOW, being out of any org, what method do you use to remain accountable in doctrine/belief/etc.... do you have an elder/mentor/etc in your ministry to look to???

for MOW.... just honestly curious, not trying to press any buttons....

[Malvaro]

I found out today that a co-worker's wife is x-UPC.... i guess we'll find out if thats good or bad....

[Felicity]

Thanks for bumping this Mal. I'd totally missed the last couple posts.