spanking is a responsibility in the correction of children and must be administered with love and responsiblity, the dont swatters among us usually raise uncontrollably little ones, dt
Well, I'm a "rarely swat" parent, and I think spanking only works for a small window of a child's life anyway. Our children are VERY well-behaved, and I can count on one hand the number of times all 3 of them have been spanked in the last year, combined.
Spanking is not a responsibility. Discipline, guidance, training, teaching and unconditional love are the responsibilities of parenting, and spanking is not a necessary part of that equation.
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"God, send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burden on me, only sustain me. And sever any tie in my heart except the tie that binds my heart to Yours."
--David Livingstone
"To see no being, not God’s or any, but you also go thither,
To see no possession but you may possess it—enjoying all without labor or purchase—
abstracting the feast, yet not abstracting one particle of it;…."
--Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, Song of the Open Road
I believe spanking has it's place, and I have used it. But I also believe that there are a lot other alternatives available and spanking shouldn't always be your first choice. Spanking when your angry or mad is physical abuse.
I don't agree that children that aren't spanked are brats or spoiled. However I believe that children with parents that don't follow through with punishment after it's been threatened are the ones raising brats. I get so tired of hearing parents say, "if you don't quit, I'm going to _____" and when the child don't quit there is no consequence for the action only more threats which are never carried out. Before you make a threat, make sure it's something you are willing to carry out. Children need limits, then need consistancy, and they need to know that "no matter what" they are loved.
Amen!
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If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV
He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV
Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
We had a little girl, maybe 18 months old, in our daycare many years ago. The weekends that she spent with her father [her parents were divorced] she came back with purple & Blue upper legs and total buttocks. We didn't know what to do about it way back then...I feel so bad now because we should have called CPS to pick the child up.
I've been in situations before when I was unsure whether I should act or not. I'm a lot more vocal and decisive than I used to be.
__________________
"God, send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burden on me, only sustain me. And sever any tie in my heart except the tie that binds my heart to Yours."
--David Livingstone
"To see no being, not God’s or any, but you also go thither,
To see no possession but you may possess it—enjoying all without labor or purchase—
abstracting the feast, yet not abstracting one particle of it;…."
--Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, Song of the Open Road
I've been in situations before when I was unsure whether I should act or not. I'm a lot more vocal and decisive than I used to be.
Miss B, Sure can relate to what you said. There was a time I would not speak up and I felt I had no voice. I found my voice and now I just need to temper it with more wisdom than I do at times. But I am in process
One thing that has been instilled in me is that it is impossible to truly discipline in an undisciplined way. My father believed that, lived that, and practiced that...(my mother, not so much). Either way, when I see parents hitting their children out of frustration, without being in control of their emotions, or as a impulsive reaction I cringe. In those cases it may be argued that you are teaching your children to hit for the wrong reasons. When I was growing up, corporal punishment was administered as if it were the result of a court martial, not in frustration, not undisciplined, not in the heat of the moment, and always after it was understood by me why it was necessary.
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There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Houston.
Either the United States will destroy ignorance, or ignorance will destroy the United States. – W.E.B. DuBois
We had a little girl, maybe 18 months old, in our daycare many years ago. The weekends that she spent with her father [her parents were divorced] she came back with purple & Blue upper legs and total buttocks. We didn't know what to do about it way back then...I feel so bad now because we should have called CPS to pick the child up.
In Tennessee it is required by law that we report it. That has been the law here for at least the last 25 yrs.
One thing that has been instilled in me is that it is impossible to truly discipline in an undisciplined way. My father believed that, lived that, and practiced that...(my mother, not so much). Either way, when I see parents hitting their children out of frustration, without being in control of their emotions, or as a impulsive reaction I cringe. In those cases it may be argued that you are teaching your children to hit for the wrong reasons. When I was growing up, corporal punishment was administered as if it were the result of a court martial, not in frustration, not undisciplined, not in the heat of the moment, and always after it was understood by me why it was necessary.
This is really the only fair way to spank, IMO, but unfortunately for the two bleeding-heart parents in this house, by the time we've thought about it, we've come up with another way to administer "natural consequences"--because both of us hate to spank. LOL!!!
Although, when my girls ran away for a "Big Adventure" a couple of summers back, and we had to call the Sheriff to track their tick-covered, muddy, tired, LOST hineys down...my husband wasn't going to spank them for it, and I INSISTED on it!
__________________
"God, send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burden on me, only sustain me. And sever any tie in my heart except the tie that binds my heart to Yours."
--David Livingstone
"To see no being, not God’s or any, but you also go thither,
To see no possession but you may possess it—enjoying all without labor or purchase—
abstracting the feast, yet not abstracting one particle of it;…."
--Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, Song of the Open Road
Here's a sad case. I know of a 20 yr old upc raised young man who spanked his 2 yr old daughter. apparently to hard. The closed fist to the thigh broke her leg.
I visited this kid in county jail for over a year while he was going thru the legal system (Illinois) His mother goes to my church, he actually goes/went to a neighboring upc.
This was his first offense.
During the trial the wife did state that he had spanked the child once beofre to hard and left bruising.
Long and short of it in illinois causing harm to a chiild is a class X felony.
He was sentenced o 11 years in Prison and under Illinois law he will do 85% of that sentence or about 8 years.
He was acrive in his church and in fact had just come in from teaching a home bible study.
My thoughts are that the harsh sentence was over the top for a first time offense.
At his trial the court gallery was full of long hair and long dress's from his church and they played up that he was a good boy, a good Christian.
The "hey, I'm a Christian" did'nt set well the judge, who could have given him the minimum sentence of 6 years.
He's been in State prison 6 hours away from his family now for about two years.
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God has lavished his love upon me.
Here's a sad case. I know of a 20 yr old upc raised young man who spanked his 2 yr old daughter. apparently to hard. The closed fist to the thigh broke her leg.
I visited this kid in county jail for over a year while he was going thru the legal system (Illinois) His mother goes to my church, he actually goes/went to a neighboring upc.
This was his first offense.
During the trial the wife did state that he had spanked the child once beofre to hard and left bruising.
Long and short of it in illinois causing harm to a chiild is a class X felony.
He was sentenced o 11 years in Prison and under Illinois law he will do 85% of that sentence or about 8 years.
He was acrive in his church and in fact had just come in from teaching a home bible study.
My thoughts are that the harsh sentence was over the top for a first time offense.
At his trial the court gallery was full of long hair and long dress's from his church and they played up that he was a good boy, a good Christian.
The "hey, I'm a Christian" did'nt set well the judge, who could have given him the minimum sentence of 6 years.
He's been in State prison 6 hours away from his family now for about two years.
Breaking the child's leg hitting with his fist...he deserves what he got and should blame no one but himself.
Re: 2 swats puts Dad in court
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