As long as you fellers and wimmin

[On The Wheel]

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

Sometimes it seems like the only way you can get out is to take a sledgehammer and completely shatter your life to bits.

I think I already bought the sledgehammer. I'm just waiting on God's timing to swing it. There's a lot riding on the outcome: the church, family, and ministry.

Oh yeah, and Preaching Truth. I can't forget that.

[Mirth1981]

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

Sometimes it seems like the only way you can get out is to take a sledgehammer and completely shatter your life to bits.

That's so true...and so sad. I've been looking at the sledgehammer but not quite ready to pick it up yet...

[pelathais]

Originally Posted by Mirth1981

That's so true...and so sad. I've been looking at the sledgehammer but not quite ready to pick it up yet...

The consequences can be severe. And you really can't anticipate how those whose lives are affected by you will react.

When I left I kept my mouth shut and just tried to disappear from the church world without creating any stir whatsoever. I was very concerned about the unintended consequences since I was involved with so many different people. Almost all of my ministerial associates treated me the same way. Indifferent silence, or so it seemed. Several would reach out later over the years.

The result was that my departure probably did not have much impact on the church and people around me. My kids did suffer from a sudden "loss of status." They went from "My dad's a preacher!" to "I'm not really sure what my dad is..." That was bumpy.

My wife cried - but was ultimately relieved from so much stress that I think it actually helped her. My in-laws thought that I would certainly abandon my family and become a drug dealer or something - typical self righteous behavior.

I was replaced with a "more faithful" and "more reliable minister" - one who is sitting in a Texas prison cell right now. Go figure. It was years before anyone realized what had happened. What a mess.

I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone follow my lead in this area. My marriage is strong despite the dire predictions of some - but from the statistics, a marriage is usually the thing that gets broken first, and then children suffer.

[*AQuietPlace*]

Originally Posted by pelathais

I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone follow my lead in this area. My marriage is strong despite the dire predictions of some - but from the statistics, a marriage is usually the thing that gets broken first, and then children suffer.

So what would you recommend someone in this position do?

[pelathais]

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

So what would you recommend someone in this position do?

I'm afraid that I have no recommendations for anyone that I do not closely know. Families are vital to us all. I wouldn't dare interfere. If someone is struggling, I have a sympathetic ear and I would like to offer hope.

It seems kind of shallow to advise someone to "go along with the program" in order to keep their family together. And, I obviously have no idea what that "program" consists of. Soul deadening conformity to a bunch of shrill harpies? I did that for a while. All along the way I kept trying to offer helpful suggestions that were seen as sedition, though I was always up front and out in the open with everything. Eventually, such talk contributed to me getting kicked out.

Someone else made the choices for me.

In the end I have nothing but a hollow and empty feeling about what should have been the best years of my life. I wouldn't dare to presume to tell anyone else what to do; except to stand tall, square your shoulders, set your feet solidly and move courageously into the unknown future.

[On The Wheel]

Originally Posted by pelathais

I'm afraid that I have no recommendations for anyone that I do not closely know. Families are vital to us all. I wouldn't dare interfere. If someone is struggling, I have a sympathetic ear and I would like to offer hope.

It seems kind of shallow to advise someone to "go along with the program" in order to keep their family together. And, I obviously have no idea what that "program" consists of. Soul deadening conformity to a bunch of shrill harpies? I did that for a while. All along the way I kept trying to offer helpful suggestions that were seen as sedition, though I was always up front and out in the open with everything. Eventually, such talk contributed to me getting kicked out.

Someone else made the choices for me.

In the end I have nothing but a hollow and empty feeling about what should have been the best years of my life. I wouldn't dare to presume to tell anyone else what to do; except to stand tall, square your shoulders, set your feet solidly and move courageously into the unknown future.

It's the Love Slave in reverse. Those who desire to leave instead are forced declare fealty and love toward the master. It is the only way to keep the extended family, also belonging to the master, intact.

It is a very bitter pill to swallow. To live a lie for love while claiming to be one of the few standing for Truth.

Ironic.

[Scott Hutchinson]

I don't agree with alot stuff and alot of things,I read here yet I don't feel that belittling people is the answer.I don't come here as often as I used to,but I try to treat everybody with kindness even when I disagree with them.

[johnny44]

Originally Posted by pelathais

The consequences can be severe. And you really can't anticipate how those whose lives are affected by you will react.

When I left I kept my mouth shut and just tried to disappear from the church world without creating any stir whatsoever. I was very concerned about the unintended consequences since I was involved with so many different people. Almost all of my ministerial associates treated me the same way. Indifferent silence, or so it seemed. Several would reach out later over the years.

The result was that my departure probably did not have much impact on the church and people around me. My kids did suffer from a sudden "loss of status." They went from "My dad's a preacher!" to "I'm not really sure what my dad is..." That was bumpy.

My wife cried - but was ultimately relieved from so much stress that I think it actually helped her. My in-laws thought that I would certainly abandon my family and become a drug dealer or something - typical self righteous behavior.

I was replaced with a "more faithful" and "more reliable minister" - one who is sitting in a Texas prison cell right now. Go figure. It was years before anyone realized what had happened. What a mess.

I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone follow my lead in this area. My marriage is strong despite the dire predictions of some - but from the statistics, a marriage is usually the thing that gets broken first, and then children suffer.

I left the assembly I attended 2 years ago but I am still a Acts 2:38 guy.My children still attend the org I once attended .I think they were disappointed that I left . It was kind of lonely out there but Im glad I made the decision to go.I see alot of things differently now.Some probably are saying hes on his way down.I like AFF even thoe I don't agree with somethings on here.GBU all

[johnny44]

Originally Posted by johnny44

I left the assembly I attended 2 years ago but I am still a Acts 2:38 guy.My children still attend the org I once attended .I think they were disappointed that I left . It was kind of lonely out there but Im glad I made the decision to go.I see alot of things differently now.Some probably are saying hes on his way down.I like AFF even thoe I don't agree with somethings on here.GBU all

OPPS excuse my spelling.

[On The Wheel]

Originally Posted by Scott Hutchinson

I don't agree with alot stuff and alot of things,I read here yet I don't feel that belittling people is the answer.I don't come here as often as I used to,but I try to treat everybody with kindness even when I disagree with them.

I'm not sure who I just belittled here with the possible exception of myself. I'm not suggesting that everyone who remains within the conservative apostolic rank live conflicted lives. I'm merely pointing out the position in which I, and I believe others also, find myself.