Quote:
Originally Posted by Mirth1981
That's so true...and so sad.  I've been looking at the sledgehammer but not quite ready to pick it up yet... |
The consequences can be severe. And you really can't anticipate how those whose lives are affected by you will react.
When I left I kept my mouth shut and just tried to disappear from the church world without creating any stir whatsoever. I was very concerned about the unintended consequences since I was involved with so many different people. Almost all of my ministerial associates treated me the same way. Indifferent silence, or so it seemed. Several would reach out later over the years.
The result was that my departure probably did not have much impact on the church and people around me. My kids did suffer from a sudden "loss of status." They went from "My dad's a preacher!" to "I'm not really sure what my dad is..." That was bumpy.
My wife cried - but was ultimately relieved from so much stress that I think it actually helped her. My in-laws thought that I would certainly abandon my family and become a drug dealer or something - typical self righteous behavior.
I was replaced with a "more faithful" and "more reliable minister" - one who is sitting in a Texas prison cell right now. Go figure. It was years before anyone realized what had happened. What a mess.
I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone follow my lead in this area. My marriage is strong despite the dire predictions of some - but from the statistics, a marriage is usually the thing that gets broken first, and then children suffer.
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