Your experience when you dropped "dress standards" - Page 17

CC1 · #1 06-07-2008, 08:37 AM

SavedLou,

Great post. I think some of these posts you ladies are making are going to really speak to some lurkers who probably feel all alone in going through that same process you did.

Some people try to make that change into something evil, that it is a result of moving away from God but as your post and others on here have shown it is exactly the opposite.

There are a few shallow women just looking for an excuse to stop adhering to a "standard" but for most it is not something taken lightly.

AmericanAngel · #2 06-07-2008, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CC1

SavedLou,

Great post. I think some of these posts you ladies are making are going to really speak to some lurkers who probably feel all alone in going through that same process you did.

Some people try to make that change into something evil, that it is a result of moving away from God but as your post and others on here have shown it is exactly the opposite.

There are a few shallow women just looking for an excuse to stop adhering to a "standard" but for most it is not something taken lightly.

I'm only on page 12. I promise I will finish.
I wanted to say that I have cried, (good cry). I'm glad that I am not the only one in the boat. This has been theiputic (sp?). I can Identify with mosts here testimoneys. I have one too. Only a few close friends know how I really feel. I keep these thoughts to myself. Bro. Epley, St Mark, I love both of you and Sisters that hold strick to standards, with the love of the Lord! My heart hurts just the same Bro. Epley in just the opposit manner. There are more Bro. and Sis's. than you think that are struggling with this. I don't believe it "evilness", or "rebellious" thoughts that is causing this "change" in the upc.
Bro.CC1, this is helping me. This whole thread is annointed. There is no arguing, only confessing our deep, in my case, fears.

SavedLou · #3 06-08-2008, 06:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CC1

SavedLou,

Great post. I think some of these posts you ladies are making are going to really speak to some lurkers who probably feel all alone in going through that same process you did.

Some people try to make that change into something evil, that it is a result of moving away from God but as your post and others on here have shown it is exactly the opposite.

There are a few shallow women just looking for an excuse to stop adhering to a "standard" but for most it is not something taken lightly.

that's true cc, and that's the difference...approaching it through prayer & scripture study and not b/c you're just tired of it. nevertheless, it is so hard to discuss with some hard core people who will forever look at you as just someone who needs to go pray through. one of my "liberal" looking friends was praying one night at church...really getting a blessing and some well meaning sisters all came up to her and were praying for her. i know she was getting a blessing...they were thinking she was feeling conviction. so sad.

as someone posted earlier...it's sad to group people as standards or no standards. all true christians do have standards. people don't realize that. as a baptist girl, i had some standards too. i didn't wear strapless shirts and shorty shorts. i might add that some of the jeans i wore were much more modest than some of our teenagers skirts, btw.

Rico · #4 06-07-2008, 10:09 AM

Standards of outward holiness. Where is that found in the Bible? lol

Blubayou · #5 06-07-2008, 10:17 AM

I have really enjoyed reading this thread. This topic has been handled with dignity and maturity. Several years ago after much soul searching and Bible searching and prayer, I came to the conclusion that many of our "standards" were traditions and not salvational. I too try to use the guidelines of moderation and balance in all things. I still look like a "Pentecostal" when I am out in public, and I still attend a Pentecostal church. But I do trim my hair, wear light makeup, and wear skirts when I go out in public. When my activity calls for it, gardening, around the house, exercising, fishing, boating, camping, I wear modest slacks or carpi's. I do not hold a postion in my church, but when I did followed all of the standards out of respect and obedience to my pastor.

Rico · #6 06-07-2008, 11:20 AM

I'll never understand why we've managed to build a culture of fear in the apostolic church. Doesn't make any sense to me. People treat God like He's just waiting to beat the living daylights out of us for having questions. Not to be preacher bashing, but I place the blame for this solely on the shoulders of the ministry for using fear to get people to "line up".

rgcraig · #7 06-07-2008, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rico

I'll never understand why we've managed to build a culture of fear in the apostolic church. Doesn't make any sense to me. People treat God like He's just waiting to beat the living daylights out of us for having questions. Not to be preacher bashing, but I place the blame for this solely on the shoulders of the ministry for using fear to get people to "line up".

Rico,
I don't think the blame can solely be on the shoulder of the ministry - it's a culture and we all cultivated it by our judgmental attitudes.

American Angel,
I too appreciate the spirit of this thread - it's been very civil and no fussing and fighting.

Rico · #8 06-07-2008, 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

Rico,
I don't think the blame can solely be on the shoulder of the ministry - it's a culture and we all cultivated it.

American Angel,
I too appreciate the spirit of this thread - it's been very civil and no fussing and fighting.

Sister, in churches where preachers use fear to get their point across, the people use fear when dealing with others. In churches where the preacher doesn't use fear tactics, the people don't use them either. People follow the example laid out for them. It's only natural for them to do so. See what I'm getting at?

rgcraig · #9 06-07-2008, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rico

Sister, in churches where preachers use fear to get their point across, the people use fear when dealing with others. In churches where the preacher doesn't use fear tactics, the people don't use them either. People follow the example laid out for them. It's only natural for them to do so. See what I'm getting at?

I do, I was just making a counter point.

I didn't grow up in a church where the pastor was like that, however, the pressure was there because it was an outward sign of your spirituality, which fostered judmental attitudes.

I obeyed things I didn't agree with out of respect for others. I will still do that if I know someone is going to be offended.

Rico · #10 06-07-2008, 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

I do, I was just making a counter point.

I didn't grow up in a church where the pastor was like that, however, the pressure was there because it was an outward sign of your spirituality, which fostered judmental attitudes.

I obeyed things I didn't agree with out of respect for others. I will still do that if I know someone is going to be offended.

I will be glad when the church gets over thinking that way. Hopefully, I will see it come to pass in my lifetime.