Just Some Things I've Been Holding In

[BroJoe]

Matt. You're dealing with spiritual oppression.

Oppression is much different than possession, however both deal with attacks from the enemy.

Ephesians 6:12 "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."

Here's my advice.

Go to the Man of God in your life, ask him to anoint you with oil and pray for you.

You need to break the back of that spirit that is oppressing you.

Fasting would be beneficial as well.

[CC1]

Originally Posted by ILG

Well that is your opinion CC1 and you are certainly entitled to it. I'm not even mad at you for it or anything because it's good that someone out there has had different experiences and can testify to such. But I don't feel bad about what I said. Walking away was one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. I'm sorry you disagree with it.

I have responded to you in times past about your comment about being "ministered" to. The very idea makes me tremble with fear. It never works. It never has and I don't see it ever happening at this point in my life.

You have yet to answer as to why you think Ephesians 4:11-16 do not apply to you.

[Amanah]

Originally Posted by BroJoe

Matt. You're dealing with spiritual oppression.

Oppression is much different than possession, however both deal with attacks from the enemy.

Ephesians 6:12 "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."

Here's my advice.

Go to the Man of God in your life, ask him to anoint you with oil and pray for you.

You need to break the back of that spirit that is oppressing you.

Fasting would be beneficial as well.

Fasting is something that should be done under the recommendation of a person's pastor. When someone is physically and mentally in turmoil, and trying to get their medication balanced, they most likely should not be fasting. I've personally seen people who were not balanced attempt to fast and become more unbalanced.

So to reiterate, someone who is taking on meds, smoking pot, and feeling very very depressed, should not imho be told to fast by someone who does not know them and will not be there to help them.

[jediwill83]

Originally Posted by Amanah

Fasting is something that should be done under the recommendation of a person's pastor. When someone is physically and mentally in turmoil, and trying to get their medication balanced, they most likely should not be fasting. I've personally seen people who were not balanced attempt to fast and become more unbalanced.

So to reiterate, someone who is taking on meds, smoking pot, and feeling very very depressed, should not imho be told to fast by someone who does not know them and will not be there to help them.

Yeah....the last thing u want is your blood sugar plummeting on top of depression...

[UnTraditional]

Dear The Matt, I usually do not post on this forum, because of all the anti-Apostolic nonsense that goes on here. Left that mess to be now an Apostolic believer who is filled with grace, mercy, faith, and true hope. Let me say this, that what some of these people on here have recommended is all fluff. You do not need to leave the Church, but instead possibly find a Christ centered Grace filled and living church that has what my home church calls Body Ministry, where the saints actively minister to one another in prayer, love, and in needs being met. I wish you were near Houston, because I would find a way to come and bring you to GloryLand Church, where there is an open Heaven, and the Lord has restored and ministered to so many people it is not funny.

Second, bro, vent. Let it out. It is OK to vent, to cry. These people who say to pray about it, I agree with them. But, let your prayers be a conversation with the Lord. Ask Him to open your heart and mind to hear His Word in prayer. He will be heard if we ask Him to let us listen. But, in this, please understand, that God will open Himself up to us, if we would allow Him to.

Bro, let me share something with you as well. Recently, I had what I consider an experience with grace. Mind you, I have not had the physical pain you have had, but the stress level I have underwent has been incredible. Between my job, my Mom's accident and pain, the now close to year long strain of the fight with Workman's Comp over her injury, and the personal struggle of watching my Mom suffer had been so very much to me that I could not take it. One day, I sat at the computer, and cried out to God with a fierce cry, and I mean I was crying my eyes out. I will never forget that as I cried, spiritually I saw behind me the Lord Jesus come down from Heaven, and ran to me, taking me in His arms and holding me, hugging me as I wept. He rocked me as I sat in the chair. What was so amazing was the fact that I could literally feel His hug around me, and His holding me. It was the beginning of my restored walk of grace in Him.

Matt, I can only make these recommendations, as a man who is a walking example of what God's grace can restore. Find a good grace filled, Spirit filled church. Get in there and allow God to move. He will, through His people. Stay on the meds, as recommended by the doctors, and stay connected with people who love you. Forgive your family for their mess, and let it go. I am praying for you.

UnTraditional
William Price

[Cindy]

Originally Posted by The Matt

Thanks for the advice and the encouragement everyone. I will not be changing my meds. For the simple reason that I don't trust having my own life in my own hands without them. I will be going back to church for prayer meeting tomorrow, and I will not be church hopping. And I have gotten one concerned call from one of the sweetest ladies on the planet, not long after this thread was started. And I also got a home visit today from my best friend in church. I know where I messed up to get myself into this current depression. I missed church, because I wanted to get high, and then I couldn't stop, and now I'm realizing 7 months of sobriety are suddenly down the drain. Let's see what else....oh I will not be smoking any pot. The only thing pot does is numb me to the point where I'm void of emotion and feelings, good or bad, and the most recent few times I've smoked 7 months ago, panic attacks. I'm off to work in T minus two minutes, so if I can get through tonight, and get to prayer meeting tomorrow, I think I'll be ok. I hope. The Matt...out.

[acerrak]

There is no easy way to approach this. My wife still has issues with depression. She will tell me have you ever felt so alone in a bunch of people. Her depression can get bad to even suicidal thoughts and not the first time.

Can i recommend something to you. Just go for a walk, put some music in and walk. exercise your body alittle. You need to do something physical, when you have bottled sruff like this up for so long you need to get a outlet, this can come in different forms but even with the stress of your job and bills, a physical exercize can truely help you.

I would also look for free help and counseling outside the church walls. the worst thing to do is nothing...

[The Matt]

I made it through the night, no doubt with help from your prayers. My mind was fairly clear, but I managed to hurt my back picking up a tv stand (that was clearly labeled team lift only...) and the chest pain was pretty bad. I considered going to the hospital, but I'm gonna wait it out one more day, because it's the type of hospital that if you have drugs in your system, that's instantly the cause of the ailment, and they stop testing right there. Anyways, I'm off to bed. Nighty-o.

[CC1]

Originally Posted by The Matt

Thanks for the advice and the encouragement everyone. I will not be changing my meds. For the simple reason that I don't trust having my own life in my own hands without them. I will be going back to church for prayer meeting tomorrow, and I will not be church hopping. And I have gotten one concerned call from one of the sweetest ladies on the planet, not long after this thread was started. And I also got a home visit today from my best friend in church. I know where I messed up to get myself into this current depression. I missed church, because I wanted to get high, and then I couldn't stop, and now I'm realizing 7 months of sobriety are suddenly down the drain. Let's see what else....oh I will not be smoking any pot. The only thing pot does is numb me to the point where I'm void of emotion and feelings, good or bad, and the most recent few times I've smoked 7 months ago, panic attacks. I'm off to work in T minus two minutes, so if I can get through tonight, and get to prayer meeting tomorrow, I think I'll be ok. I hope. The Matt...out.

[Cindy]

Originally Posted by The Matt

I made it through the night, no doubt with help from your prayers. My mind was fairly clear, but I managed to hurt my back picking up a tv stand (that was clearly labeled team lift only...) and the chest pain was pretty bad. I considered going to the hospital, but I'm gonna wait it out one more day, because it's the type of hospital that if you have drugs in your system, that's instantly the cause of the ailment, and they stop testing right there. Anyways, I'm off to bed. Nighty-o.

Praise God, I hope you sleep well.