ROFL!!! This is a great post. Did he ever calm down and admit he was wrong? I have noticed that many times the traits that give Pastors the perseverence and doggedness to carry on in hardship and stress also makes it hard for them to admit when they are wrong and to apologize.
nope. He fired me a few months later. He was convinced that "God" had shown him something dire about me and how that I was "hindering revival." Of course that leads to the story I'm not supposed to keep repeating here...
And you're right about the doggedness. Sometimes I've wondered, "Are they driven, or just stupid?" I don't mean to be too unkind, but really. What makes a man (or woman) get up every morning and make the same mistakes over and over again?
Being around these folks just fills me with despair. You're supposed to learn from mistakes. Adapt, adjust, grow.
But some folks have confused personal growth with "compromise" and are just stuck being emotional and angry adolescents their entire lives.
I can assure you it is true. Why would he tell people not to talk to us? But please people understand, I never thought he was a bad Pastor. I am not bashing men called of God. I have been blessed to have had a wonderful Pastor during the earlier years of my walk with God.
Peace, Sinatra
This happens. Many reason for this too. They don't want the truth to be known. If they feel there's a reason for you not to be there and didn't have enough guts to tell you why, then why would they want the members to talk to you and find out your side?
This happened to my former husband and I, so I know it can happen.
__________________
Master of Science in Applied Disgruntled Religious Theorist Wrangling
PhD in Petulant Tantrum Quelling
Dean of the School of Hard Knocks
An Internet forum is a poor place to seek an answer to this question, but I'll take a shot at answering the question: "Why would a pastor do this to me?"
Most pastors are notoriously reluctant to lose good saints.
Does C.F.O. mean the "person in control of the finances?"
Most often when a person leaves a church and nobody comes to attempt to win them back, there's a reason.
Take a good long look in the mirror, and if you like what you see, wipe the dust off your shoes and go on and serve the Lord.
P.S. Your husband's a minister and it sounds like there are 50 people looking for a church, round them up, rent a hall, and call it revival.
P.P.S. If I didn't know why I was asked to leave, I'd ask the one who asked me to leave. He probably knows the answer; none of the rest of us have any idea at all.
Stephanous,
I think the Bible would tell us in Jesus' parable about the wheat and tares; that many times a saint 'labeled bad, inconsistent, or troublemaker' would be compared to the tare that has to grow up with the wheat, because if it is plucked up and removed it may take a good plant who isn't quite rooted enough with it.
I said all that to say, many Pastor's 'label' a person based on many things other than facts, and even if there are questionable facts...the person being in church is the best place for them. The church should be a place for everyone...even the "goats".
Blessings, Rhoni
P.S. and for CC1- it isn't necessary for us to know the rest of the story. The harvesting of the wheat from the tares is up to God not the Pastor.
I understand your situation. I had something similar happen to me last fall... a pastor whose congregation my family had left to start another work was extremely rude to me (I discussed this briefly in the Shunning thread also) and wouldn't even acknowledge me or speak to me when he was standing right in front of me and made eye contact with me.
I would say that the best course for you is to pray hard and forgive him - whether he ever acknowledges what he has done, or whether you even ever have an opportunity to speak to him. Your best defense against bitterness is to pray for him and allow this to be a learning experience for you. You'll have an excellent example of how not to treat someone else.
You will find those here who are quick on the trigger to defend those in the "old boys club" at the expense of your feelings, however legitimate they may be. When I first posted my situation - honestly looking for help with dealing with my feelings, not trying to bash him - the defenders were out in full force. They questioned my integrity, my motives for posting (even though I did not mention his name), and assured me that the man I was referring to had "an impeccable reputation" and obviously could not have done what I said. "There has to be more to it" is the term used for "you must be leaving something out" and "it couldn't possibly have happened like that." And while I'll acknowledge that there are two sides to every story, when someone is hurt the hurt is very real... and there's NEVER a good excuse to hurt someone.
God bless you!
__________________
Instead of studying to make sure what we believe is supported by Scripture, we MUST study the Scripture to see what IT TEACHES... then BELIEVE THAT!
Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2.15 KJV
nope. He fired me a few months later. He was convinced that "God" had shown him something dire about me and how that I was "hindering revival." Of course that leads to the story I'm not supposed to keep repeating here...
And you're right about the doggedness. Sometimes I've wondered, "Are they driven, or just stupid?" I don't mean to be too unkind, but really. What makes a man (or woman) get up every morning and make the same mistakes over and over again?
Being around these folks just fills me with despair. You're supposed to learn from mistakes. Adapt, adjust, grow.
But some folks have confused personal growth with "compromise" and are just stuck being emotional and angry adolescents their entire lives.
WOW, it happened to you too? A board member discerned something about me, told the Pastor and caused a lot of trouble and ended in my being forced to leave. If the church had been Pastored by a seasoned minister and had more than 50 adults - I would have taken it to the church, but I was not interested in staying or proving anything.
Thank you for sharing. Makes me feel like I am not alone, we are not alone as it happened to several on this forum/in this thread.
Yepper - but remember that the spirit of the prophet is subject to the prophet...this goes for those discerners and words of knowlege people. You have to be careful that it isn't about your agenda - but about God's. One way to tell is based on the word....there is a Biblical way of removing troublemakers from an assembly and it isn't through means of a discerner or words of wisdom by someone who who have a secondary gain from using the gift.
Yepper - but remember that the spirit of the prophet is subject to the prophet...this goes for those discerners and words of knowlege people. You have to be careful that it isn't about your agenda - but about God's. One way to tell is based on the word....there is a Biblical way of removing troublemakers from an assembly and it isn't through means of a discerner or words of wisdom by someone who who have a secondary gain from using the gift.
Blessings, Rhoni
... or a pastor's threatened ego!
__________________
Instead of studying to make sure what we believe is supported by Scripture, we MUST study the Scripture to see what IT TEACHES... then BELIEVE THAT!
Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2.15 KJV
Re: Why would a Pastor do this to me ?
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