Quote:
Originally Posted by bbyrd009
I have to believe this would work; a healing, basically. The 4 year old male homosexual in my experience, a family friend growing up, did not get this. Mom wore the pants, btw. |
I have a great passion for helping homosexuals. I feel the church, at least the ones I have been connected with, treated the issue with very little to no love. In 25 years of ministry I have had the opportunity to minister to 40 or so homosexuals, mostly males, to one degree or another. I don't sidestep the clear commands of Scripture concerning the sin, but I do have compassion and I believe Jesus can deliver the homosexual of the deep seated lies that consume the mind of the person struggling with same sex attractions.
In every case that I have dealt with, all 40 individuals did not have a normal, healthy relationship with their fathers. Either the father was physically absent from their lives, he was emotionally distant or he was physically or sexually abusive. I talked once about 20 years ago with Dr. Joseph Nicolosi in between sessions at a seminar and he confirmed my suspicions about the origins of homosexuality. He said in his practice that exclusively focused on the "reparative therapy" of male homosexuality that he never dealt with a single client that had a right relationship with their father. Its not the only contributor, but it's a huge factor.
Some homosexuals are adamant they have no desire to change. I have counseled with those and there is nothing you can do but release them to God and pray. Others I have counseled with could admit they struggled with same sex attractions but did not embrace a gay identity. Nicolosi calls these types of individuals as "non-gay homosexuals." One young man came to me years ago, a teenager, who admitted he had struggled with homosexual thoughts, that he had observed gay porn and he had a couple of homosexual encounters, one with another young man and one with a stranger in a park. He was mortified by his struggle. He was effeminate and had a dad who was clueless about emotional attachment and affection with his kids. He also had a strong mother who was definitely a matriarch type, more so out of necessity than desire, because of the apathy of the dad. This is also a reoccurring theme in a homosexual's homelife: a dominant mother, in many cases a smothering, overprotective, controlling figure that helps to encourage identifying with all things feminine rather than encouraging masculinity.
This young man communicated that he didn't want to be gay. He wanted to grow up, marry have kids and lead a normal life. We met for many weeks after school, praying, talking, doing Bible studies and being friends. That was 15 years ago and today he is happily married with children. When I see him I ask about how's doing and he knows what I mean and he'll communicate how he's doing in relationship to the temptations. I believe for him it will a lifetime challenge to overcome that sin, just like all of us who must deal with certain weaknesses that are against God's intended plan for our lives. The victory is that he came to me before he was too far into the lie and was able to focus on his desire to live for Jesus more than anything. He is living according to the truth and God continues to empower him to live victoriously.
As a side note, he called me one day to tell me he was getting engaged. He asked me if I thought he should share with her his past. I told him I thought was only fair tom tell her now than for her to learn about after marriage. He told her, she forgave him and said she loved him even more for his honesty. He is the best case of dealing with homosexuality that I personally know of, although there are thousands of "ex-gays" who are living proof that homosexuality can be overcome like any other sin.
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