Quote:
Originally Posted by 1ofthechosen
This made me laugh so hard. Aquila, I sold it, smoked it, ate it, I lived life for it. It's very addictive. Not addictive like hard drugs but a very mentally addictive drug, and very hard to kick. You already romance it, so you are day dreaming about getting a life long vice. i don't know whats going on in reality? Reality is where I come from, the front lines, I've smoked medical grade which is way better especially from Colorado so please stop trying to sell that excuse. What's going on in reality is that that same old prostitute got her a new dress and now she has become high class. She may can fit in a little better, but at this point they are grasping at straws. They've gone and adopted hallucinogens and Uppers that were hard street drugs for years, and are selling the public on "oh now this is good for you." While the court system was charging people for man slaughter on getting caught with too much of the same type of drugs, they are saying this about! (LSD, and MDMA).
That's the real reality, but believe whoever you want. I lived it, I'm a living breathing, walking test subject who has been set free from the liberty you so seek by the blood of the lamb!
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I just want the racing thoughts to end. The fear to cease. I'm tired. I feel like a car with the alarm system going off all night. I'm so done reliving things I don't want to relive. I'm tired of the intrucive thoughts. Things that horrify me. I'm just wanting to wake up and feel my mind... still. At ease. And be able to know that for the rest of the day... I'll not be holding back this feeling, these thoughts, and smiling like I'm okay so that I don't make anyone uncomfortable.
I was talking to Chris. The kids will be with their biologicals for the 4th. Things whent really badly last 4th. Chris and I will be home. But she doesn't know, I'm already feeling the nerves. I'm already feeling that feeling in the pit of my stomach like I'm on a roller coaster. It's been with me all week. Richards didn't have to die. Everyone is going to be "Saluting the troops" and waving flags and cheering like the troops were sent away to summer camp or something. Where's Richards? Where am I? Better yet, where's Jesus? I know He's here. I know He was there. And I know that He can see me, why is this happening to me?
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