Quote:
Originally Posted by rrford
I have neither the time nor the inclination to be lectured about others hurts in this venue. Yes, people have been hurt. But to really heal one has to realize many wounds are also self-inflicted. But you will rarely hear any of these folks admit to the errors they made that aggravated the situation.
And you have to want to be healed in order to be healed. When one continually comes back to pointing out the hurts they suffered and the failing they have seen, then yes, I believe they are thriving on such things. They cannot live without the being able to point to the scars of being wounded. I would rather point to the scars of healing. Just me, I reckon.
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Sometimes, the wounds are too deep to simply glance over with a quck cliche.
Although I agree that hurting people often aggravate their own pain, I know personally that it is healthy to find an outlet to express the hurt and pain.
The hurting has to be able to separate their past hurt from their current reality-- resisting the impulse to lash out at others who had nothing to do with the offense.
Those who have hurting people around them should listen to the hurting, looking for the opportunity to help the hurting to heal.
If one is not interested in helping the hurting to heal, then the could be helper's heart is not right.
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