Obey Them that Rule???

[originalsecretplace]

Originally Posted by Michlow

Thank you Felicity. I believe that too. Yes, I have issues, lots of them! And I avoided dealing with them for a very very long time. They started to surface when I originally found FCF, some of you might remember that. And then, I got tired of the dealing with it. I thought if I could just squish myself back into the same mindset that I had when I was first saved. When I believed everything I was told, and did everything I was told, and didn't question anything. Well, then I would be happy and comfortable again.

Guess how well that worked? I really tried, but I couldn't silence the questions or the doubts. It was on New Year's day when it came to a head. I was sitting on my bed, with my Bible, just kinda thumbing through. And of a sudden all the questions, all the apparent contradictions all the things that didn't make sense came boiling to the surface. And I just started to cry and said "God, I really don't think its supposed to be so hard! Why do we make it so hard? Nothing makes sense anymore and I can't stand it!"

And I prayed for a while I had a realization. I didn't care about standards, I didn't care about church or its programs, or tithing, or the role of women, or even doctrine. Because all of that junk had completely clouded my view of Jesus, and I didn't even know who he was anymore. Was he the harsh judge that was just waiting for me to show I wasn't "holy" enough so he could smite me? Was he the one that demanded absolute perfection? The one for whom nothing was ever enough?

At that moment, I made a New year's resolution, that the rest of that stuff could go in the garbage for all I cared. All I wanted to know is "Who is Jesus?"

So for right now, Yes, I do think that the rest of that stuff is unimportant. All that matters is my quest to find out Who He is. After that...well...who knows...

Ok Mich... I'm sitting here crying at my desk... it's all your fault..

The Lord gave me this back a few years ago:


Psa 27:7 Hear, O LORD, [when] I cry with my voice: have mercy also upon me, and answer me.
Psa 27:8 [When thou saidst], Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, LORD, will I seek.
Psa 27:9 Hide not thy face [far] from me; put not thy servant away in anger: thou hast been my help; leave me not, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation.
Psa 27:10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.
Psa 27:11 Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies.
Psa 27:12 Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty.
Psa 27:13 [I had fainted], unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
Psa 27:14 Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD