Originally Posted by Aquila
LOL
No seriously bro. My standard was that there had to be a "token" of authority upon her head and it had to be "cloth". I didn't care if it were a veil, snood, bonnet, doily, part of a barret, ribbon, or what. My standard was when she was in church she was to wear some form of cloth in her hair. She didn't see it, but bless her heart, she did it anyway for a long time, because she loves me. I allowed her to use different styles and colors to coordinate with her outfits. We were attending an ultra conservative church. Bro, we didn't play or watch sports because we didn't believe in fresh air. I mean, there was no phone, no light, no motor car, not a single luxurie. I was on the verge of disengaging all media, including radio and the computer. But then I had a son. The retention rate of the church's youth department was less than 6%. Yes, 94% or more of our youth FLED the church upon graduating. That troubled me as a parent. It was so strict bro, I can't begin to tell you. Men were expected to wear white shirts with no more than one pocket. You were expected to be "dressed up" all the time. If spotted in jeans you were asked why. My wife and I began to suffer from spiritual burnout, and we're still recovering. One night I was expected to lead service and my wife was on the praise team, she rushed out of the house and forgot her "token". Bro, we were running late and I snapped. I began to curse and berate her, demanding that she never act so spiritually irresponsible again. By the time we got to church my precious wife was sobbing and in tears. I demanded that she stop sobbing and that she clean herself up and try to find something to use in her hair at church before approaching the platform. I watched her wipe her tears and pull herself together like a good soldier. I'll never forget her shake her head yes while gazing down when I demanded that she find something to put in her hair. I realized that I was abusing her over a cloth. I was hurting a woman, the woman I loved, a daughter of God... over a cloth. I began to seek the Lord on it and he began to show me a better way. He began to show me that Paul's issue wasn't a focus on a cloth, but rather modesty and submission. For the first century Christians the women were abandoning what was proper and modest. This rebellion from modesty and submission is what crossed them up with God, not the fact that they abandoned a cloth. It was their spirit not a doily or veil that God was concerned with. There isn't anything magic in the hair or in a cloth. God began to reveal to me many things about that church and the extent of abuses that we tolerated because we thought that it was par for the course, the narrow path, if we expected to be saved. Today we're not attending that church. We're still healing and we're still hurt in many areas. But I know this much... I will never again become entangled with a religion that is built on external focus and pleasing men with token jestures or talismanic magics of hair or doilies. I've found Jesus. And I'm learning for the first time what it means to live in the shadow of the cross.
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