Speaking of modesty we had a preacher and his wife join us for Church the other Sunday he was an Apostolic preacher and his wife had on a skirt that just cleared the knee and when she sat down it came up above the knee had on some glasses that had diamonds in them and some sexy looking shoes..I though it was so funny cause I know at one time he has preached on modesty and nothing his wife had on would classify as Apostolic modesty..I just love watching how the apostolic/upc is changing.. I am talking this lady could pass very well on a street corner the way she was dressed...lol
Speaking of modesty we had a preacher and his wife join us for Church the other Sunday he was an Apostolic preacher and his wife had on a skirt that just cleared the knee and when she sat down it came up above the knee had on some glasses that had diamonds in them and some sexy looking shoes..I though it was so funny cause I know at one time he has preached on modesty and nothing his wife had on would classify as Apostolic modesty..I just love watching how the apostolic/upc is changing.. I am talking this lady could pass very well on a street corner the way she was dressed...lol
The sad thing is, They probuibly didnt even realize this. Just because you wear a dress doesnt make it modest apparel!
1) People will dress in their best expensive clothes they just bought.
2) People will "Shout".
3) People will gossip out in the lobby rather than sit in the service.
4) Single guys will be on the prowl for single girls.
5) Single girls will be strutting their stuff for single guys.
6) Trinitarians will be bashed.
7) The three steps will be reinforced.
8) ...895 times.
9) Acts 2:38 will be quoted.
10) ...and quoted.
11) ...and quoted.
12) People will eat WAY too much at Denny's at midnight.
13) They won't leave good tips.
14) Evangelists will network desperately for revivals.
15) Pastors that are sick of their churches will put out "Feelers" for a new place to go.
16) Standards will be preached.
17) ...and preached.
18) ...and preached.
19) But people will still eat too much.
And there you have it. Save your registration fee, I covered the entire thing for ya.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Smith
Several things have come to mind since I posted my 100% accurate prophecy:
20) There will also be single guys on the prowl for other single guys.
21) Pastors and especially, pastor's children will catch up on all their TV watching in the hotel room.
22) The evening preachers will be rated against one another to determine who was best and who wasn't so good.
23) At least one speaker will take advantage of the opportunity to set every person straight that's in the UPC.
24) A trophy will be presented to the fastest growing church which grew with the same people from last year's fastest growing church.
25) Credit cards will be maxed out on clothes, food, clothes, food, clothes and food.
I have been gently made aware that I am out-of-date, which I can't argue with since I have been to a General Conference in ions. I now know that Denny's has been replaced by The Cheesecake Factory as the primary choice of the GC Overeaters Club. Also, my inside source tells me that everybody watches TV at home so General Conference is no longer the ultimate destination for the TV-deprived. This concerns me, however. If this is true, this is going to kill the attendance. Heck, that's the only reason I ever wanted to go!! If it weren't for the annual General Conference, I'd have never understood the greatness of Rockford Files, Happy Days, Three's Company, Hill Street Blues, LA Law, movies like Karate Kid, and First Blood...Thank God for General Conference!!
I have been gently made aware that I am out-of-date, which I can't argue with since I have been to a General Conference in ions. I now know that Denny's has been replaced by The Cheesecake Factory as the primary choice of the GC Overeaters Club. Also, my inside source tells me that everybody watches TV at home so General Conference is no longer the ultimate destination for the TV-deprived. This concerns me, however. If this is true, this is going to kill the attendance. Heck, that's the only reason I ever wanted to go!! If it weren't for the annual General Conference, I'd have never understood the greatness of Rockford Files, Happy Days, Three's Company, Hill Street Blues, LA Law, movies like Karate Kid, and First Blood...Thank God for General Conference!!
We should go to a GC and raise cain.
__________________
"If we don't learn to live together we're gonna die alone"
Jack Shephard.
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