Quote:
Originally Posted by lisafitzh2o
Okay, this might be slightly off topic, but in noticing the rise of the divorce rate in church, I've wondered WHY this is happening. (Okay, besides the devil working overtime and stuff like that.)
I remember being a teenager in the church and feeling tremendous pressure to hurry up and get married. It was everywhere....youth rallys, camps, Youth Congress, etc. It was like you were supposed to "snatch a man" the minute you got your diploma (IF you bothered graduating). But my "secular" friends weren't going through this. Do we Apostolics put pressure on our kids to forego an education and career to pursue marriage and children? I remember turning 20 and feeling like such the old maid. As a matter of fact, I was pretty much the only one in my youth group who went on to college. But I had parents who constantly reminded me to get an education, a career, travel, and find out who I was before settling down.
A psychologist once said, "A person is going to go through every stage of life at some point...be it at the time they should or at another time". He said these kids who marry young never got to experience being a teenager, so they end up in their 30's wanting out of the marriage to go have fun.
So, basically, in my ramblings I guess I'm wondering how many of our church divorces are stemming from immaturity.
What do you all think? Am I totally off base?
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I don't think at all.
I don't think marraige something to be rushed into. I'm wit Rhoni...if a guy is putting pressure on me, then he ain't worthy of me.
I tell my daughter all the time; get an education pursue a career, have fun. Don't rush into a relationship/marriage.
I am going thru this phase now where I want to do things I have never done before. Someone invited me to go to Africa with them and I was game.
But b/c I couldn't find anyone to watch the kids, I had to opt for next time.
Missions trip.
I am undergoing a career change and my outlook on life is different. I don't let others define who I am and what I like. Or what I do.
I was so insecure as a young woman. I like being middle aged. I am more confident, know what I want (and don't want!)
So a guy can't step to me like he did 20 yrs ago.
I would encourage any young person to develop yourself. Accomplish goals and pursue dreams. Live and enjoy single life to the fullest.
Because you'll never have this opportunity to do these things again.
Love is eternal. We mistakenly believe that there is only one person for us and once that person is gone, there goes our opportunity to be loved.
I say NO!
There are many whom we can make a decision to love and be compatible or have 'chemistry' with. That has been my experience.
Love will always present an opportunity to crop up into your life as a rose in bloom. It pops up in seasons.
Sometimes it is with one person forever. This is where you hear of the folks married for 65 years. My hats off to them!
Sometimes love pops us with different folks. Different seasons.
Let's face it, folks. In this imperfect world we live in, marriages fail. It is horrendous and it hurts.
But I be a canine in a catfield if I let one failure keep me from trying at love again!
LOVE IS ETERNAL!
I believe in love.
To the young folks, it is wisest though to get yourself together first before seeking marriage.
Love will always be there waiting for you, boo. Get some money in the bank. Get your career going. Get some investments going. Get involved in ministry.
Because if you don't, all those things-or the lack of them, can cause a GREAT strain on marital relations.
Stressing about money, running from the call of God, not sure what to do when you retire...these are some things that can cause great strain on marriages
Empower and enable yourselves to be the best marriage partner you can be, in the best time.
When there is money in the bank, there is more time to focus on love. Kids can go to best schools, you can live in decent neighborhoods, pay the bills take vacations, etc....
When you are fulfilled in a career or ministry, you won't expect your marriage partner to fulfill all of you. Reserve that portion of who you are and place it into a part of your life that is just YOU.
I am speaking from experience.
Love ya
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