Here's my two cents worth on this heavy question... 'why are the women the ones who have all the dress standards' question.
First of all, woman was created FOR the man.
I Cor. 11:8 "For the man is not of the woman; but the woman FOR THE MAN." And if we back up one verse to
1 Cor. 11:7 it says, "but the woman is the glory of the man"
It has been so, since Adam and Eve were created, that a woman has always sought to please and be the "glory of the man.” Whether we women want to admit it or not, pleasing the opposite sex is something that comes very natural to us by taking special time and effort with our appearance. Most importantly, it should be our husband that we are seeking to please. In that case, a wife wanting to be pleasing to her husband, should dress herself in such a way that she would be the "glory of the man."
1 Cor. 11:7
Now, man, meaning males, have realized also, that because of the headship and order that Christ has laid out for the church - God, Christ, man and then woman - that the women are more accustomed to being subjected to authority, in a generalized way of speaking.
So if women would truly seek to dress in such a way that would bring glory to the man/husband, and to Christ, then we wouldn't have any problem with the immodest world we are dealing with today.
Back in the early days of the holiness/Pentecost movement, sincere men wanted to protect the honor of their wives and females in their congregations, after seeing the dangerous turn the fashionable society at that time was taking, with women beginning to dress in a way that showed more and more of their body. I believe these men honestly were seeking to determine exactly how to enact a standard of dress to keep modesty the focal point.
That sincere desire, I believe, has led to the mess we are in today, because the
tradition has been taught, over several decades, and the
true meaning behind those rules has been lost. If we were to go back and see just why these rules began in the first place we would see that the original intent of the early founding fathers of the holiness Pentecostal movement was to protect their women from the onset of a society as a whole basically beginning to “take off their clothes.” If you read any literature from the 1920s and 1930s it was not uncommon to see women beginning to wear makeup, wear less clothing, and even put on clothing that had typically been for males only.
So we have arrived here today where the question of modesty is a totally different look than it was 40, 50, 60, or 70 years ago and the turn of the 19th century. I know the clothes I wear today are not the same as what I wore twenty years ago. So, what is modesty? How does one determine if you are modest as clothing styles change? This question continues to be debated, and probably ever will be.
Important point I am trying to make is that we have got to learn that the
basic principle of modesty never changes, even with styles and fashions. I may change exactly what I put on my body to cover my nakedness, but if God cared enough to sew animal skins for Adam and Eve to cover their bodies after their shame and sin had entered the world, then he must care that his believers not uncover our nakedness to the world around us. What exactly is nakedness? How to determine that? That is where the Holy Ghost comes in. Jesus said, the Holy Ghost would be our teacher, and would lead and guide us into all truth!
John 14:26
And, it should be up to the MAN under CHRIST to set the rules for his family according to how his family should dress. Using the proper headship, with pastor/bishop/elder/preacher nowhere in this headship lineup, then a woman who wants to bring glory to her husband, will accordingly dress, and ACT in such a way as to be pleasing to both her husband and to Christ, asking the Holy Ghost to teach and guide.
The woman is subject to more rules and demands than the man simply because of our God-given nature to please the opposite sex and the order of the headship. We are taught to be submissive to our husbands, but that our husband is to love us as Christ loves the church. When all this is in place, this works in perfect harmony. I have seen many such marriages where this was possible. Submission is definitely a tricky issue and if not carried out with complete submission to God first, then it can result in terrible things. I’ve seen those kind of marriages too!
So, you have woman who naturally desires to please the opposite sex, and then you have the male desire to look upon a woman, which desires are God-given. So, woman’s natural desire to please the opposite sex can easily become used in a way that could be considered sensual, provocative, and even harlotry in the end. This is where modesty has to play a huge role. If women begin to dress in such a way to please men other than our husband, and to draw and attract undue attention to ourselves, and in doing so, begin to uncover more and more of our body, then something has gone wrong with the heart. Unless the husband actively communicates with his wife/family about issues of modesty, dress, and conduct, then the rules will continue to be laid down by the pastors of churches in an effort to somehow stop the overflow of the sensual world into the church.
This is where, I believe, the men of our day have failed in their homes. To recognize the onslaught of nudity and where it takes them, and to ask God for direction and how to keep it from destroying their home/family.
This is heavy stuff. This is hard to swallow. I know I’ll probably be “quoted” and misquoted on some of this. Please understand the spirit that I am writing this in though.
I’m a woman. I want to please my husband. And I DON’T like all the rules that have been imposed on the woman in the holiness movement because many of them are excessive and heavy-handed, and simply the desire of man to control the women, and have nothing to do with modesty.
Yet, after much careful study and prayer about the issue, I’ve come to realize that because of a woman’s desire to look pleasing in the eye of the opposite sex, that this desire oftentimes can get out of control, and the idea of modesty and covering up nakedness can be forgotten. If you don’t believe me, look at our world today. Nakedness everywhere you look. Homes and families are broken, and more and more people are turning to the occult, and to drugs and alcohol, and than ever before. Sexual promiscuity self destructs ultimately. Of course, you cannot say that is not the only problem with our current world. But it is one of them for sure.
Under the authority given to the overseers/bishops/elders by Paul, they are cautioned to warn, and reprove and exhort the saints. I also believe that husbands, under the leadership of Christ himself, should take authority in their homes, and enact rules of dress/modesty. Their authority is biblical, according to the headship outlined by Paul. The rulers of the church should also warn about the dangers they see lurking in their congregations, which may include provocative behavior, pride, vanity, and the list goes on, but nowhere is it stressed should they lay out certain limitations of clothing/dress.
The purpose of the overseers of the church should be for the edifying of the saints, teaching them basic principles upon which those principles understood, then can be applied in each one’s individual life/home. If principles of modesty were taught, allowing the HUSBAND to be the ruler of his home, under Christ, then pastors/bishops/elders would not have to spend time on the “standards” but would simply teach principles of modesty, and have each family endeavor to put those principles in place under the leadership of the true leader of the home, the man.
I know we are not living in a perfect world, and there is no perfect answer to this question, but biblically, the above paragraph describes how this modesty issue should work.
You may ask me – so how does it work for you? Well, I am so thankful to say that I have a wonderful husband who loves me and shows his love for me in many ways. One of those ways is to tell me if I have something on that could be too tight, too revealing, or whatever. Sometimes its hard to see yourself, and know how something really looks. He always shares with me too how wonderful I look whenever it is pleasing to him. I seek to please my husband. I don’t want to uncover my nakedness to anyone other than him. Modesty comes from the heart, and is evidenced by one’s actions. It is truly a heart issue, of pleasing God first, and then my husband.
I know this has been a lengthy post, and I know I’ve raised plenty of issues that are sensitive to all of us. My desire here is to try to somehow address the issue of the holiness and modesty, and ultimately the only answer we have for sure is to go back to God’s Word for the direction we need for our lives today. And that brings us back full circle to LOVE. For that is the greatest commandment of all, is to love God with our hearts, soul, mind, and strength!
Matthew 22:37
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