Back to the original question of "How do you deal with a gay friend". If you are stumped and need to buy some time and the gay friend is male I suggest giving him a gift of either Marilyn Monroe or Judy Garland's greatest movies on DVD or a CD of the "Best of Broadway Musicals". He will love you forever.
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Originally Posted by Cindy
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It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. (Psalms 118:8)
As a child, I had NO CLUE what a bonafide 'homosexual' was. I only knew that it was an adbomination to God to be a FAG, or a HOMO, or a QUEER. words that came across the pulpit many times in my young life. My family had no dealings with any homosexuals, nor did we have any in our family circle. (That we KNEW about). This lifestyle was talked about with disgust, venomous words were used to describe them, and the word 'hate' was used in the same sentence as 'homo' quite a bit.
Imagine my surprise when, in my 40's I had to rub elbows with a co-worker that was openly gay. Six months after I got that job, he got a better offer from a company and he asked me to go with him and be his assistant. I jumped at the opportunity. Best boss I ever had. We are 'friendly' to this day. He knew that I didn't agree with his lifestyle, but we decided to agree to disagree- in an effort to continue to be friends. I rarely see him anymore, but if I saw him tomorrow, I could hug his neck and eat lunch with him.
Since that time, I have had several folks in my family 'come out'...I hurt when I see the way they are treated by the old time Pentecostals in our family. You will never win someone that you have embittered. It will never happen. When you refuse to come to family get-togethers, and Christmas dinners, or weddings, or funerals- because 'they' are going to be there- YOU have the problem, not 'THEM'.
Is the fact that I treat them as the family they are, a sign of compromise and tolerance? NO. It's simple courtesy. A word that I fear is swiftly disappearing among some circles in the Apostolic movement.When I hug their neck and say, "I love you"- they know I mean it. Because I DO. In actions, and in words. I am NOT saying that I love the way they are living. I love THEM, the human being that they are. We ALL have sinned and come short- God help us ALL- none of us have yet MADE IT to glory.
Just my two cents worth.
Gay people are sensitive and kind. They hurt inside. At least all the ones I've worked with are. I worked under a gay supervisor. I was most comfortable knowing that he was not the type to feel professional jealousy.
I had a gay forum friend. He lives in San Francisco but is from my region. I could always count on having a decent discussion with him. He even cracked jokes about his gayness.
I would have a really really hard time being mean to gays. I do not agree with their lifestyle, but I always try to be kind to them and not shun them or lecture them. Believe me, they have heard it all.
We can only pray for them that God would sent the Holy Spirit for conviction in their lives. It is up to them. Their choice just like heterosexuals makes choices.
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It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. (Psalms 118:8)
So, cut them off. That's excellent. That greatly increases their chances of coming to God.
Brilliant.
The only reason I could see turning away from a friend who is in sin is if you are so weak, that you can't be around them without falling into the same sin. If that is the case, more power to you. Maybe introduce them to a new friend who isn't so easily "infected.".
So, cut them off. That's excellent. That greatly increases their chances of coming to God.
Brilliant.
The only reason I could see turning away from a friend who is in sin is if you are so weak, that you can't be around them without falling into the same sin. If that is the case, more power to you. Maybe introduce them to a new friend who isn't so easily "infected.".
Yes but you do not know or dont care what Jesus says about it.
9 I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:10Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world.11But now I have written unto you not to keep company , if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat . 12For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within?13But them that are without God judgeth . Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
Does he call himself a brother? If so you must keep no company with them. If you continue friendship with them you yourself are being disobedient. Be courteous as with anyone. But do not hang out with them.
God calls them wicked. If he says they are they are. It will just embolden others to sin if they are coddled.
It appears that this thread has turned from my initial question of how to best handle "the talk" that I feel is on the horizon, to people telling me to be nice to him. He is my friend. I would never not be nice to him just because he struggles with something I do not. We ALL struggle with things.
Just wanted to make it clear that the question of whether to be kind to him isn't even on my radar. It's a given.
It appears that this thread has turned from my initial question of how to best handle "the talk" that I feel is on the horizon, to people telling me to be nice to him. He is my friend. I would never not be nice to him just because he struggles with something I do not. We ALL struggle with things.
Just wanted to make it clear that the question of whether to be kind to him isn't even on my radar. It's a given.
Seriously,
If he thinks he is saved, on his way to Heaven, etc. while practicing homosexuality as if it is right, you need to cut him off.
If he is an out and out sinner, not professing a saving faith in Jesus Christ, then maybe you can be salt and light to him.
However, I think the scriptures are very clear concerning people who claim they are saved but are practicing sin without repentance, or at least the conviction that the sin is wrong and sinful.
There are sinners who think they are Christian, they think they are saved, but they are deceived.
During the conversation that is on the horizon, if you can determine where his mind is, then with humility and prayer, you can respond accordingly.
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"The choices we make reveal the true nature of our character."
Last edited by Jermyn Davidson; 01-29-2013 at 06:23 AM.
Seriously,
If he thinks he is saved, on his way to Heaven, etc. while practicing homosexuality as if it is right, you need to cut him off.
If he is an out and out sinner, not professing a saving faith in Jesus Christ, then maybe you can be salt and light to him.
However, I think the scriptures are very clear concerning people who claim they are saved but are practicing sin without repentance, or at least the conviction that the sin is wrong and sinful.
There are sinners who think they are Christian, they think they are saved, but they are deceived.
During the conversation that is on the horizon, if you can determine where his mind is, then with humility and prayer, you can respond accordingly.
Or maybe just allow for difference of opinions, and let the friendship continue.
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Hebrews 13:23 Know ye that our brother Timothy is set at liberty
Or maybe just allow for difference of opinions, and let the friendship continue.
Big problem with that Timmy when the Bible is very clear about people who profess they are saved with blatant sin that they don't even think is wrong in their lives.
We shouldn't try to be friendlier than God.
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"The choices we make reveal the true nature of our character."
Seriously,
If he thinks he is saved, on his way to Heaven, etc. while practicing homosexuality as if it is right, you need to cut him off.
If he is an out and out sinner, not professing a saving faith in Jesus Christ, then maybe you can be salt and light to him.
However, I think the scriptures are very clear concerning people who claim they are saved but are practicing sin without repentance, or at least the conviction that the sin is wrong and sinful.
There are sinners who think they are Christian, they think they are saved, but they are deceived.
During the conversation that is on the horizon, if you can determine where his mind is, then with humility and prayer, you can respond accordingly.
We all have lack in our lives, all have sinned and come up short, however, we don't just give up, we believe our sin is under the blood, and we are accepted of God. It is better that this person confesses faith in Christ, than to just be an "out and out sinner", everyday that he prays and reads scripture is a day that he could be healed and set free. Everyday is a day that the Spirit of God could convict his heart to walk more closely with the Lord. Every other sinning Christian you would likely not cast off, so are you judging justly?? Yes, there could be a point to cool the fellowship, but that should not be the starting point.
As I have mentioned before, our senior pastor, has personally mentored seven gay men over the years. Five of them have long since married ladies and have children, two of them have led celibate lives for over 15 years. There have been some failings over the years, but these have continued to pursue God, and to overcome same sex sins. This is for one reason, the local church did not throw them away!!! Oh, that all sinning "saints" would as aggressively pursue overcoming their sins. The sinning gays, don't have much on the crooked straights, all have at times come up short. The hatred of Christians toward "gays" is not very worthy of the body of Christ.
__________________ For it is written, "As I live, says the Lord every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall give praise to God. (Romans 14:11- NASB)
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