Regarding the first paragraph,
According to every Scripture that displays the character of God after the ascension, He IS a King, seated on throne, waiting for all things to be made subject to Him. There are too many Scriptural references that support this to list here. It doesn't mean that He is a King who wants His people to "wield the bolts of Jupiter against those who take His name in vain", but He is the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, and God of Gods who will reign in true righteousness and holiness. He is a loving King but also displays His wrath for all the world to see during the Great Tribulation and coming battle of Armaggedon. This King expects His people, who have been translated into His Kingdom, to live on this earth as He expects them to live during the Millennial Reign, in the same righteousness and holiness as He, Himself, reigns in. I'd like to get into what I call the "eternal perspective" of Christians, but I don't know if we have the space or the time.
Regarding the second paragraph,
Paul mentioned the wrath (violent passion, punishment) of God 17 times. It is wise to see the character that Jesus exhibited in His earthly ministry as He wants us to display the same character. Paul said, "Be imitators of me as I am an imitator of Christ". In my opinion, it is very unwise to dismiss the anger and wrath of God. To do so is willfully ignoring the Scripture, whether looking at a literal dispensationalist or hermaneutical approach to study. Both methods of study, in my opinion, support the display of a portion of the character of God that was shown in Noah's day, to Sodom and Gomorrah, and will be shown again in the coming Tribulation and Armaggedon.
Regarding the last paragraph,
"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit, in which he went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, because they formerly did not obey..."
1 Peter 3:18-20
I believe that, through the mercy and love of God, He preached (and continues to preach) the redemptive work of God through the sacrifice of the cross to the spirits of those who weren't able to hear the Gospel preached to them before their physical death. I believe this Scripture clearly states that God allows all men to hear the Gospel, whether in the body or out of the body.
I also find it interesting that you feel your beliefs line up with hermaneutical study of the Scripture but you are using outside sources of material in order to support your beliefs.