Disfellowshipped - Page 10

Felicity · #91 09-06-2007, 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster

I think quite a few posters have put me on ignore. Does that count as being disfellowshipped?

If they've done that then you know what that means, right?

Felicity · #92 09-06-2007, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRINGE_NUTTER

Same here, but I have separated myself from quite a few in order to keep my sanity and dignity.

LOL! Some will drain you, that's for sure.

A Cruce Salus · #93 09-06-2007, 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CareyM

I will say this...I know of a couple who has been disfellowshipped from a UPC church. The reason's they are not completely sure of, only that there was disagreement with the pastor.

Also, another couple may have been disfellowshipped as well...will know later today.

What say ye?

Did the pastor talk to them? How could they not be sure of the reasons?

QueenEsther · #94 09-07-2007, 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CareyM

This is sad but true.

I did not start this thread to bring up old wounds...I'm truely sorry for what you and others have been through. We had a terrible experience with the church my husband was raised in...have many of the same thoughts you've expressed here.

However, I don't believe it's like this everywhere...there are some good people in UPC that really do want to help people.

Amen! I have been in the same church my whole life and have only had 2 different pastors but thankfully they are both VERY longsuffering. I don't think I would attend a church that had a habit of disfellowshipping people. I think if there is a MAJOR problem and they are in leadership maybe sit them down off the platform or ask them to take a break from their role so that they can just be fed and concentrate getting over their problems but never "Kick them out". God will move Mountains if you will ask!!

LaVonne · #95 09-07-2007, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by A Cruce Salus

Did the pastor talk to them? How could they not be sure of the reasons?

I don't believe the pastor has informed them himself, but rather sent out an email to all staff members stating they've been disfellowshipped and forbidding and contact with them whatsoever.

LaVonne · #96 09-07-2007, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by QueenEsther

Amen! I have been in the same church my whole life and have only had 2 different pastors but thankfully they are both VERY longsuffering. I don't think I would attend a church that had a habit of disfellowshipping people. I think if there is a MAJOR problem and they are in leadership maybe sit them down off the platform or ask them to take a break from their role so that they can just be fed and concentrate getting over their problems but never "Kick them out". God will move Mountains if you will ask!!

This is great...what I love to hear!

LaVonne · #97 09-07-2007, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pelathais

You're absolutely correct about the UPC. And don't worry about my "old wounds." Talking things out in a forum like this has actually been good for me. Many of the spots that used to be too tender to touch have healed (or grown calloused?) to the point that I don't jump like I used to when they're touched. I'm almost becoming reasonable again.

In our culture you can't really talk to anybody when things go wrong. We have these walls that we throw up to prevent "bad news" from getting around. The result often ends up being that the bad news gets around anyhow- and good people are often left hanging in bewildering circumstances.
Sometimes it's good just to be able to say, "You know it hurt a lot when that happened to me." All a person needs to hear in response is, "Of course! That kind of thing's gotta hurt." And then when you think about feeling sorry for yourself and you say, "Everybody's a wretch and I'll never be happy again..." It's important to have someone respond, "Now you've taken it too far. Sure it hurt, but if you let it, it does heal too."

A think a lot of people just fester in a hurtful condition because they never had anyone confirm their hurt. Because they never got the feedback of, "Yeah, that's gotta hurt..." they feel like they have to prove just how bad it was- and still is. And so, the healing never gets started.

Sigh...this is so true...

I'm glad you've been able to talk here on the forum and vent, it's healthy! (to a certain degree)

Barb · #98 09-07-2007, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRINGE_NUTTER

Same here, but I have separated myself from quite a few in order to keep my sanity and dignity.

I know that's right...!!

Revelationist · #99 09-08-2007, 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CareyM

Just curious...has anyone here ever been disfellowshipped from a church?

Pastors, reasons would you ever disfellowship someone in your congregation?

I think that I was. After I left, people wouldn't talk to me, they would turn their heads so that they didn't have to look at me. Everything was fine, untill I decided to leave. I guess that helps scare others into staying because they don't want to be treated that way.

TRFrance · #**100** 10-25-2007, 09:06 AM

Matthew 18 seems to also give biblical grounds for disfellowshipping someone:

15 “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. 16 “But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed. 17 “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.