For those who want to know...RULES at my church!

Originally Posted by freeatlast

No one, who has never been in the situation, can ever truly understand what those who have been touched by spiritual abuse, have been thru.

This is true. Though they can feel for the person, they really do not know. The same goes for any difficult situation as well and not just this subject. You know when you have connected with one who truly understands and has been there.

Sad thing..the abusers don't even understand what damage they are causing. Many in fact think they are doing it God's way.

I saw this mentioned by at least one other in this thread. This is very true. I've even said of my former UPC pastor, that if he realized how many people he harmed through the years, he would feel awful. But he was blind to the things he did. Thankfully he has retired and pastors no more.

I truly believe that the vast majority of apostolic ministers that have fallen into abusing people do not realize, or do not fully realize, what they are doing to people. Some are simply doing what they saw other ministers do that were also abusive. Some do what they do because they are over zealous in their beliefs and believe they have to help people keep what they feel is important to one's walk with God. Some have been hurt themselves and so they are always concerned someone may be trying to take over or cause trouble and so they impose rules that have no place in a body of believers. There's many reasons for why the abuser does what he or she does.

I believe any organization that issues ministerial licenses (no matter what they call themselves) should be concerned and take action when they hear about a minister they have licensed that is doing things that are harmful. They do have the authority to take away a license or not reissue one. To hide behind the statement that "we are just a ministerial organization and all our churches are autonomous" is a cop-out.

While that person holds a license, they are representing the organization that gave the license. Thus, as in the case of the UPC, their rules require that any minister licensed by the UPC who pastors a church, there is to be a mention of it being a UPC church on the sign somewhere. It matters not if they are officially affiliated.

So when one of these ministers gets messed up, their actions reflect on the organization. And when the organization does not take action, then it reflects poorly upon the entire body.

At my former church, the District Superintendent well knew there had been problems through the years. People from my church even went directly to him. A family from my church left (this was before my time there) and started attending the DS's church and their daughter married the pastor's son. That family knew of abuses in the church. There is no way that the District was ignorant.

But the years passed and people continued to be hurt and the pastor continued with his license, unchecked. This should never have been.

Lois